I could Pop Up Anywhere

In my life I truly could end up anywhere at any moment. I do enjoy the spontaneous aspect of my life greatly, but it makes making plans in advance dam near impossible. I went briefly to upstate NYC to experience the energy of the healer from Brazil known as John of God. It was the Omega institute I was not a registered guest and was asked to leave, but not before I expereinced a deep state of stillness and a feeling that I had come to have my healing and greater awakening. Leading up to it I had quite a few emotional buttons that were pressed. I have been following the flow and allowing myself to feel that all things come to pass. I have been to so many places in this amazing a country and I want to find an amazing place and bring together many like minded people. Many places float thru my head as possible places. I believe that we are all perfect and we just need to stop and see our perfection and not focus so much on our flaws. I have given love and received and confused lust for love and unhealthy for healthy and the other way around. I am trying to find a deeper center. Trying to not try so hard, but not to allow myself to fall into certain patterns that don't offer me a chance to grow. We are all on our own epic jounreys which just have to be willing to take the first step. And we will know when it is time to take that step. In the meantime we merely need to enjoy where we are in this moment and not think that another place or situation is going to fix our problems.

I have also learned that people betray you, but don't view their actions as betrayal and all you can do is let it go or let bog you down. You just have to keep moving forward otherwise you are living in the past. I want to live in the present and experience the bliss that is always available. Recently I have been feeling a desire to express myself, but not sure what to say. Tai-chi, chi-gong, yoga, etc.. these are just some ways toward a quiet mind and open heart. I want to be brave though my mind sometimes trys to get in the way. I can not heal anybody I can only hold the space for people to let go of their pain when they are ready. We can be vessels for healings all of us can be its just some of us allow ourselves to be that vessel. There are many different ways to heal and the most powerful one is to be present.

Finding Those Emotions

Often I find that what I want is to cry what I want is to feel and see things that I have been hiding from myself. I find that often I cry other people's tears as part of their healing. I have been desiring to have a female partner these days. It has been a strong feeling stronger then it has been at any point in my life, but I know that I just have to release the attachment to it and just let it happen. I find there have been many almost situations. I want to have that relationship that helps to awaken feelings in me that have been dormant. I don't need a relationship for those feelings to be awakened. I need to focus more on having a relationship with the life force that is present everywhere. I love deeply and I lose track of the days and my passion for trees is epic. All of us are chasing after things that we already have and the mind convinces us that we don't have it yet. I am striving on a spiritual path to a point of having a peace that can not be shaken. I have not reached that point. People from past are always returning and ones from my present disappear in a visual sense. I merely introduce them and play the small role of matchmaker. I am still somewhat in awe of how close I am getting and part of me wants to say I am close enough to God and I'll just leave it at that, but that is not an option. I have to finish what I started. I have to remove the veil and see beyond this world into another.

New York Magazine Makes You Legit

Maybe you know the song your nobody til somebody loves you. Obviously your nobody until New York Magazine has a big picture of you in their spread. People want to know that some magazine has written about you and then you are obviously legit. I'll take the free press and allow it to open more doors for me. It is just the beginning. We have people working on Te"DeVan and Smiley for 2008 around the clock and around the world. All the pieces are in place and we are making a brave charge uphill. No we don't think we will get elected. Getting elected is for chumps. We want to make some changes we want the Bill of Rights to mean something. And if New York Magazine can help me in that quest so be it. The candidate to watch in this election is the American people. And I have met quite a few American people and they are ready to make some changes. Lets be the change lets be the change. It all started in LBI when my soon to be Vice PResident said "Hey you want to start a revolution?" My response was "Hell to the Yeah". It was a protest about the unfair cop treatment towards young people. This continues to this day and I want to lower the voting age to 16. LEts get young people involved early on so that it becomes a habit for them. Ideally I want 12 year olds to vote but that will take some time, but now lets recognize young people as voting citizens. We are the ones fucking it up for them they should have a say in the direction of this country. They live here and pay taxes. No taxation without representation for the youth and prisoners of this nation.

The candidate who can't win but you can't stop watching. We will be on your televison set this campaign season. Roll Tide Roll

Lets Shake it Up Starting Now

Let the dance to the Whitehouse start to heat up. We are ready to take back the whitehouse and take back our government and make it one that serves the people. How about instead of killing and bombing people in the middle east we offer billions of dollars in scholarships so that more young people can go to school without racking up debt. Everyone claims education is important but they are lying thru their teeth. Winning the election is important and most voters are scared of the boogie man. Convince them that you will protect them from the boogie man and you will have their vote. Of course our foreign policy over the last hundred years has created man boogie men. Bombing people does not make you friends I learned at least this much in elementary school. We are also putting much of our country behind bars because it makes certain people alot of money. 2.1 million our in prison where they hell are they being hidden. Most of them are not a threat to society. The prison population has gotten up 700% in less then 30 years. Not surprisingly privitizing of prison has increased greatly. The war on drugs is a farce and it hurting our society. Why don't we start arresting people for having eating disorders I am sure that would help the problem immensely. The war on drugs is a drain on our economy and resources. Lets end it now and put the money towards education, children, and cleaning up our environment. I am not politician I am just someone who sees a need and knows alot of people and I am ready to help make these changes happen.

My Healing guru comes to Me

John of God the healer I went to go see in Brazil 2 years ago is coming to upstate New York. I will be seeing him soon and realizing a greater level of stillness in my mind and an ability to help more people by fining a deeper peace inside of my core. The same core that everyone has if we will just make our mind quiet. Yeah the past roars its head only when we have not fully embraced it and then after we embrace the past we must release it and find ourself here in the present and find that we must be the change that we want in the world instead of getting down on other people for the drawbacks. People will let you down, but God never will. Merely be patient and trust. This sounds insane, but it is much more productive then stressing out about things you can't control. I am waking up more in each moment. Last night I walked away from a beautiful woman because I was more compelled to walk around and heal. I invited her to join me, but she wanted to sleep with me. But she also wanted me to give her answer that I only she can find. I hope that she finds it and she helped me to realize what I truly care about and what I am truly here to do. Every might I have all sorts of people come up to me, but there are a special few that are really ready to let go in a way that changes the way that they will look at life. Those are the moments that I live for. Those are the moments that they show in movies. Your life is a movie and if you can realize that very simple fact if you don't remain so attached to things. Break your routines and follow what you feel where the energy or inner voice is guiding you. We are all being guided we just have to listen and act on what we feel in our highest nature.

Bleeding On myself and my health

Inside of exists the cure, but we look away for another way. Bleeding out the cure for the disease like some sort of x-man similar to wolverine. Maybe I can donate my body to science. I am altering my molecular structure thru the stillness of my mind. I am a lover of this life and finding a strength in realizing the power of my breath to manifest a world that has deeper and more profound peace the knocks the statues of rampant consumers back into the present moment. We belong to the oceans, lakes, forests, deserts, and mountains. We are one with our surrounding and for some reason we are trying to conquer. But we must dig ourselves out from the mind clutter so that we are no longer merely machines. Sense the imbalance and then we can correct in ourselves and the mind gap grows larger and we begin to march forward. We are moving thru the water with such grace and we are all part of the same face.

I can feel my body shaking

I've noticed that from time to time as I start shifting from one energy into another that my body starts to shake and I get this amazing tingling sensation thru my entire body and I will basically fall over. It does not last very long but it feels amazing and it feels like I am waking up and shifting to a higher vibration. Life is an amazing voyage and at certain points we need to step forward even though we don't know if there will be anything there to catch us. We can't stand still and keep everything the same. I all things were created and all things fall apart. They are merely things and they serve a purpose and then they are no longer needed. I want to thank anyone who at any point has helped me on this journey. I am continuing to let go of my routines and trust my intution under any cirumstances. The pulse and direction of life can change quickly almost without warning, but if the mind is very still we can always be aware of something coming around the corner. I have not quite realized that level of stillness, but the more still my mind becomes the more I become aware of the way that we are all connected and how every little action that we take has some significance in this story. We never know who will be moved to the front of the stage in our lives. Love is not merely a word that desire to utter from my lips, but something that I desire to know internally. Everyne has something to make me aware of and I just need to be quiet and pay attention.

Give me A Fairy Tale

There was a boy and he was a believer and they taunted and mocked the believer though secretly they wished they could be that naive. But was the boy really that naive or were they merely basing the idea of truth on all the pain that they had experienced in the world. They let go of hope and settled into conformity and they loved him and hated this boy because he couldn't seem to conform. Even when he did certain things that were expected of him he still always fell short of giving them that comfort they felt around most people who never questioned what was going on around them. He was born to question and this boy stayed a boy and when other people got older he seemed to stay the same age. Time was passing everyone else by, but he stayed timeless because he found his way out of time. Then the system that everyone else had come to count on fell apart and they turned to this boy and he was nowhere to be found, but all of the people he helped to wake up lead the way towards a new world that was more in balance. People remembered to breath deep once again and with that breath all was transformed. That boy/girl exists inside all of us we must merely let him out to play.

They Never Saw It Coming But You Always Knew

It here comes straight down the plate the pitch you've been waiting the one that you can hit out of the park. The one that you have prepared for you entire life. So we are finding that deep silence in the mind and in that we are finding that we have always been that which we seek. I am here and there is no place that I will ever go to other then the deepest peace in my mind that will ever give me the peace I desire. Most of the happiness I experience though wonderful is so fleeting and I find that there is something that I am starting to realize more and I am going back to the days of NYC and the old south with quite a bit of the west coast and an overseas vibe. I don't want to promise anything other then a willingness to be the one that is not willing to settle for that which is comfortable. You are the truth when you find yourself letting go all that which makes you suffer. As we release our attachment to our desires we will not feel that we have been thwarted and therefore do not become angry if things don't work out the way we had hoped.

TThey Build You Up to Tear You Down

I hear one story about how amazing someone is only to see the press ride them for being on steroids or some sort of growth Hormone. I just don't want to hear it anymore about whose doping and who isn't. We are country that is obcessed with our drugs. We have a new pill for any situation. Having a problem losing weight, staying up late, going to sleep, not happy anymore, addicted to pain killers, etc.... We have a pill for you. Life in America for so many people is about some pill that will make all the problems go away or at least numb them. Why is that I never read an article about road scholar who was cuaght using ritalin or some other speed type drug so that he could study longer. Our sports must be pure, but other then plagrisim the same does not hold true for the academic world. We are society obcessed with winning at any cost. The costs are very high and our winners are some of the biggest losers in the end.

I am in San Francisco and my heart resides here more and more. I really love this place, but I will soon be back in NYC. I will be walking around following my bliss and listening to my intution. I send everyone my fondest wishes wherver you maybe found. I am just a man on a journey realizing that "This too will pass". All things pass and all things eventually end so that a new beginning can be found. We all hae to become our own light so that we can be the same for others. I am lover of the stillness and that stillness is where my anwsers will be found. I will always be judged and praised, but neither is something to base your life around. They are both so fleeting. It is this thing called Love that everyone talks about and most people feel for brief moments. When the light is strong enough the darkness can not exist....


You and I are mirrors for one another and I am here to hold that space. And I will hold that space a space where miracles happen. It wasn't me who did it I just happened to be present when it happened. When it happened they all forgot about all the things that seemed so important and became aware of the only thing that means anything when it is all said and done. Most people around you suffer in ways that you don't want to imagine and to help ease that pain by helping them realize their true self is to be of the greatest service to humanity. Be the change you want to see in the world and get involved. Don't just sit on the sidelines.

Straight Out of Black Rock City

I am back in San Fran and ready to keep moving forward in regards to all the things that I am up to these days. Life is amazing in the way that we are all lead to where we need to be at any given time if we just allow ourselves to trust our intution. I had one of my best burning man expeirecnes and I look forward to my 5th Burning Man next year. I really want many of friends to come to the event next year. It is starting to get biggger on the east coast, but still predominantly a west coast event. They called it the "Green Man" which was quite ironic, but some improvements were made so that the impact would be slightly lessened. But as Burning Man gets bigger people seem to get overwhelmed and not feel as connected to each other the way they had in years past.

I am going to a spiritual retreat at some point in October probably down in Austin, Texas and allow myself to find a deeper and slower breath that brings me more fully into the ever present NOw. This moment is the only moment that you have so allow yourself to experience it fully and don't try to run from it. I met an amazing girl at Burning Man who I will be hanging out with before I leave town. Burning Man allows me to meet so many different people that I know from numerous places. There are always going to be challenges, but all of these things eventually come to pass. I recently read that we are almost never upset for the reasons that we think.

I am dancing with myself walking around as a stranger in strangeland even though it all seems so familiar, but with a different texture to it. We have an ability to impact each other in positive and negative ways, but we have to make those choices. I am making a choice to be free and understand that the mind always wants to remain distracted and I just have to bring my focus back to the present moment. I have made mistakes, but I am blessed to have learned from most of them. But the greatest mistake I can make is allowing myself to forget my time/space/location.

I could become a celebrity over night, but that would solve nothing in regards to my greater spiritual quest. There is a quote about how the only thing worse then not having your dreams come true is having all your dreams come true. This basically is stating that you become aware that once you have achieved all of your goals you will not necessairly be at peace with yourself. I must make peace with myself I must not allow my mind to dictate my life. I want to come from my heart more often and be truthful with myself and others. I want to live the oneness and not merely speak esoterically about oneness.

Many times our greatest accomplishments are the things that the mind so quickly overlooks. So easy to criticize, but much harder to offer sincere compliments. May I be a person that helps people to realize their dreams and even more importantly help them to let go of their suffering.

Don't You Forget About Me...

I love mOlly Ringwald I love the breakfast club I want to do a remake of it or do one using the original actors and have it be about their kids in the same situation 20 years later. I am never ceases to be amazed about how excited people get about my height and how many people talk to me in a given day and say "So does anyone talk to you?" I recently ran into a girl that I had met in Goa India and she was in shock that I was there and even more shocked that I made it back. SHe asked me how I made it back. I should have told her that I am really good swimmer or that the Little Prince taught me how to use the birds to fly. I am leaving for Burning Man and I am planning a midwest tour involving Indiana and Chicago and I will go to see the Dala Llama.

I love Llama's, but not as much as I love camels. I am going to the desert. I love NYC but I feel that getting out of town for 2 weeks is just what the doctor ordered. Hawaii is calling and I am going to put some roots down there in the near future. I miss everyone everywhere and I am sure that I will see a few of you soon at Burning Man.

A funny Society

More and more frequently I find myself viewing western society as an outsider. Recently for any football fans Michael Vick a professional quarterback in the NFL has been facing charges involving dog fighting and though I don't approve of his actions I think it humorous that such a meat eating society loves their dogs and cats but will kill their Cows, pigs, deer, chicken, minks, rabbits, and horses but somehow dog fighting is inhumane, but people still kill animals merely for their fur. Henry Kissinger has still never been charged for war crimes at any point. In fact he still has a great deal of involvement in foreign policy, but Michael Vick is the worse villian of all time. He is being made an example of because we love our pets and hate most other animals. In the west if you are a dog or cat you are very lucky, but if you are anything else such as a cow you should have chose to be born in India.

I have been remembering the feelings of being a stranger in a strange land while I was traveling thru India. I remember how valuable every human interaction seemed and how emoptional my connections instantly became. Some people go to India to continue their escape while others go to open parts of themselves that have been closed off for so long. I am traveler even when I am staying in city for extended period of time. I will always be a nomad and everyone in a greater sense is a nomad of sorts no matter how much they pretend otherwise. All of this world is fleeting and though we understand this we still get caught up in things that mean nothing because we imitate the other people around us. Hey I love you and I am merely telling you because not telling you is much more unacceptable. I don't always allow myself to express love because I would rather play it cool. Playing it cool never made me happy it usually just made me insincere or nervous.

I'll never be anything other then what I am

Pretty simple statement. Elton John's gift is his song and my gift is my healing and it is also quite simple. I have been on a wild roller coaster and part of that is my karma and part of that is my addiction to having the pot stirred and some of it is because I still don't want to let go because I am want to hold onto things that are not true. I want to hold on to things that are comfortable even if they hold me back. Eventually they will not longer serve me and they never served me but I felt that I needed them.

I have a flurry of thoughts going on these days but the biggest is the massive change the world is going thru. I sometimes wonder how the heck reads this blog according to my the ticker you the reader are truly spread all over the world. We all keep evolving, but still we care more about what people think then we actually care about people. I hope to see that change in this lifetime. Our identities are so fragile because they are based on something that never existed. We all need a rebirth someone to come along and challenge everything that we have based our lives on. They do in a way that is both intense and gentle. We all surrender to something beyond what we understand when we are ready to take that leap. Some of us get pushed into that leap. I think someone or everyone helped to push me when I was looking but I was always blind man wandering around with large signs.

Can you read the sign and does it even matter. Can you feel that peace that brings down the walls. Write all over the walls. All over the walls all over the walls. Feel that earthquake in San Fran and know that we will all be okay. The new day is here now can you see it or are you still living in yesterday.

Rfight Around the corner

As soon as you turn that corner anywhere in the world you never know whose world your going to collide with and how someone that you thought was out of the picture is coming back whether you are ready for it or not. John of God comes to upstate New York on October 1st and will be there for at least 4 days. This man will manifesting miracles of a intense physical magnitude. I am finding that this moment of now with rain outside as I sit in my buddy Jay's apartment in Brooklyn is the only moment that I can be present in right now. We are finding a deeper bliss and the ego slowly slips away because it never really existed and therefore can't ever have a hold on me. We are at at point and perhaps we have always been at a point. Every time period serves some sort of purpose.

Let the rain come and perhaps San Fran and Portland are paging and the flow always knows which way to go. If we could all stop and kiss and embrace a tree all of us would be free. We can all be once we set our minds free. I truly love Amma that beautiful hugging saint how she paints new colors onto your eyes of perception.

I know of politics but I know more of people and all of us are watching a world that can not continue to sustain itself if it keeps going in its current direction. Smile at someone today and do something that will just floor someone whether it be someone you love or a perfect stranger. Keep giving and the planet will keep living in a way that keep us all in a habitat that is communion with its natural environment, I just want to keep remembering that love inside of me and never be distracted from the greatest spiritual gift which is the inward knowing of love. There has to be a word such as hogkeytha which somehow says all that I could ever want to say even though i just want to feel the deepest silence in my being.

And then the Floods Came....

So I totally had an apartment with a bunch of people and we were going to do amazing things and then the rains came and then even a tornado came and Dorothy and Toto were no where to be found and sewage seeped in and the roommates decided we should all abandon loft. After 6 years of being a Nomad I signed a lease only to have it end just as it started. Perhaps Portland or San Fran are calling me or maybe I'll go back to the midwest and bring back the Naked Mile to Ann Arbor. Maybe I'll just live in a veggie oil bus with a whole bunch of people.

I have a week in which I have been having all sorts of connections back to Ann Arbor and even running into a guy named Ken who I met at internet cafe in Goa for about 15 minutes. One of my good buddies sold himself on ebay for almost $1000 which makes me think this might be a great way to raise money for the campaign. I will sell myself as a public servant to the American people to the highest bidder.

It will all be on the up and up and the money will go towards a fleet of vegetable oil buses and in which intriguing and humorous Americans will board so that we can rediscover our country. Consider it similar to the Lewis and Clark expedition even though I am sort of banned from their campus. Much love to the Jersey shore and anyone anywhere who is being true to their hearts desires. Being untrue to yourself will hurt so much more in the long run. Don't ever forget that. I love you all and see the writing on my sleeves.

Musings of Now

here come the channel opening up as the rain stops. we have found that starlets and Avatars are not so different from one another. You are my sister and he is my brother and too many other people are merely viewed as others belonging to another. There is no separation and I have desire to talk less and merely be more and if this upsets you then that is how it must be. Loud sounds ringing out of my mouth like the Tibetan bowls that you hear at the monastery, but that monastery feeling is our true nature. That feeling of the church, temple, mosque, or holy place is the sacred land of silence where words no longer have to be spoken. We are flying to a whole new dimension that has always existed, but we are becoming more aware of and the logical people will have their logic turned inside out.

The Great Gatsby was sad and lonely and we have become a country of Great Gatsby's thinking a Rags to Riches story in material wealth has any greater meaning. To not be true to yourself is demeaning and our minds need cleaning. We must do away with the things that no longer serve us and we must allow new people and places to enter into our life. Go west young man/woman. The unease is merely a tease or a prelude to the virtuoso of the mocking all that is held so sacred in a world of people that talk one way and end up living another. I have committed this sin before and it takes me away from the fullness of grace that is always offered if I would merely allow myself to receive, but we can not receive love when we try to deceive love.

Now all of us must allow ourselves to perceive the love that never went away we always seem to put it off for another day. But that day is now here in the solitude of a cave until we are ready to engage with all that is and be the opening between this world and the unseen world which is much larger. Science will be a whole new world by the end of 2009. We are entering into age of change that can no longer be held at bay because it has always been the way and no longer shall falseness and ego sway.

Rainy Day In NYC

I feel more and more expectations from other people being placed on me and though I am pretty good on not taking them on the pressure has seemed to intensify. It makes me realize that I don't want to do that to anybody. Amma came to NYC a couple of weeks ago and it was a beautiful and spiritual majestic time and though alot of people came most people choose to miss out on the experience of a blessing from a saint. I still think most New Yorkers think they might melt in the rain. I love it when it rains and I think that I kind of miss Spain. I became Te'DeVan in Barcelona and there has been no looking back since that point. I recently listened to a Beatles cover band at BB kings with some friends. I feel like mentioning small details because the other things are hard to articulate, but I can certainly feel things waking up inside of me like a sleeping dog when the thunder sounds. I am starting to settle into a place for the first time in 6 years. The Dharma Pad is born and in another week I look forward to seeing you guys come and visit. We all need to keep following our dreams and being what we desire and surrender things over to a higher force. We have to have trust and faith that things will work themselves out. I have been around the Chelesa area of NYC which I had predicted to a friend of mine a couple of weeks back and circumstances I have pulled me out here more often. I have a cookies addiction especially Uncle Eddies Vegan cookies. The Presidential campaign has picked up a few notches and more components to the project are coming together.
All of us are finding our way thru the storm and there will be a rainbow and it exists here and now you just have to open up your third eye. Open up your third eye and cut the ties to the mundane and do your sundance and raindance and you will find God's romance.

The Faster Things Move....

I just want to slow my mind down and just completely allow myself to be and not allow myself to identify with the currents of change that take place on the surface. I want to immerse myself in the joy of stillness and not allow myself to be overwhelmed by all the developments that seem to be transpiring so rapidly. Even if we are to achieve all of our goals this does not ensure our happiness or that we will find a deeper lasting peace. I find myself being threatened by so much change taking place. Many things that I have come to identify myself with are no longer true and I am starting new chapters in my life. I am being the change more often and this makes my ego feel threatened. Often after my most profound moments I find myself reverting to previous behaviors that do not actually benefit. It could be something as simple as eating too many cookies. There is a subtle sense of feat that I am experiencing and I am trying to escape from it by taking comfort in cookies, but there is no comfort to be found. Many of my dreams are manifesting into reality and this makes me very excited and nervous. I am focusing more deeply on love because love is all we need is more then just a song it is one of the greatest truths that exist. I am here to help people find a greater peace not to increase my identity.

I want to send out my love to all of my amazing friends that I have not spoken to in quite sometime. I want to write about love that changes all of us because if one of us undergoes a profound change then all of us undergo a profound change. The change is to have a deeper realization.

Be HERE Now

Now more then ever these words have been ringing strongly in my head. There was yesterday and there will be tomorrow, but only this moment that I am in right now offers me the power to surrender to the change that my soul desires to experience. To rid myself of my ego and identity and to realize that I am merely attached to a whole bunch of things that ultimately holding me back from knowing the infinite love that we are all capable of experience. I went to the beach and all sorts of realizations became clear to me. I am addicted and though it may not be to drugs or sex ultimately I still have addictions that desire to be fed so that I will repeat the same patterns and not realize the oneness that we all are. Cheating anyone merely means to cheat yourself and don't waste your energy being angry with someone about the choices they have made. You can only make your choices and be at peace with whatever those choices maybe. I forget my true self and when I do I end up clinging on to things that have already served their purpose. I hold myself back because I am scared to jump forward. All of us will move forward because that is the nature of life. Someone recently has asked me to play Bhagavan Dass the 6 foot 7 inch tall guy from Be Here Now and Are You Here Now. I found it fitting and humorous and the writer/director happened to have graduated from U of M which also made me smile. I met him at Amma also know as the "hugging saint". This woman really figured it out and just let herself become the love that is the foundation of all living things. We can all be hugging saints once we just allow ourselves to be here now.

Don't take the silence personally

Sometimes I don't want to talk about the weather or how my day is going and I don't want to have insipid conversations focused on some sort of mental masturbation. Okay maybe that is a bit harsh, but I just don't want to talk I just want to be there in silence and listen to the nothingness that is everything. I don't want to join your religion remember I already have my own (no not judiasm) just my own religion and I don't want anyone to join. New York brings out my edge. There is this one guy in NYC that is exremely angry man who keeps yelling at me and threatening to fight me and has once thrown a glass bottle at me. He basically calls everyone a racist and does not want to hear any information that might indicate that you are not a racist. New York is full of the most wonderful and heinous people though the extremes are not quite as intense as India. I am falling in some sort of love/lust/liking with a girl twice a day on a slow day. The amount people interactions I have here sends me to a point where I merely desire not to talk anymore. Furthermore I am obcessed with the song "Don't You forget about me" (what narcissitic person is not?). I don't want to be a holy man I just want to be like Andy Dufrane whose colors were too bright to be held in any sort of constraints. The pain gets deeper and either you surrender or suffer, and if you surrender then you won't suffer and if you suffer then you haven't surrendered. Surrender to some unknown force or spend at least half of your time worrying about things beyond your control. Lets be more vain what do you think and lets pretend like we care about Paris Hilton and her prison time. Forget about Darfur and just call my name and lets help Lindsay Lohan and Brittany spears find a musketeer AA meeting. Lets all become friends of Bill and let's make Bill the 1st man this way he can have more time to have more sexual exploits. Okay maybe this writing is tinged with a little edge, but it was something that has to come to the surface so that it can be released. Don't pretend not to be pissed when you are putting your fist thru the wall. Less talking and more being less talking and more being.

Prince has nothing on me and I will write even crazier lyrics. Much love to my friend Simeon and may all my friends go on to fuck or make love to their celebrity of choice and then we can all read about it in the New York Post. Tell me more about amazing eccentric wonderful people in Kansas and Alabama and less about Hollywood. And lets leave Brad and Angelina alone. By the way Tom Petty is teaching me how to fly so fucking high thru TM meditation. Lets all be yoga buddhists swimming in the clean part of the Hudson river. Hey Jenna Rae what a great dam name and may the dance last all summer long.

I a m GOing to WIld Extremes to find Balance

I want to scream and I am screaming. I feel there is so much coming at me and I just need to trust more. But this trusting thing can be so fucking scary, but if you don't trust then you just go insane. And maybe everything will go all wrong or all right or maybe you don't even know the difference anymore. You can sense what is around the corner, but your not exactly sure that you want to confront whatever it is and you are growing up and being part of something, but you have always been part of something. You feel disconnected because your scared to breathe. You have possible romances and possible living situations, but nothing has finalized itself. Even if the world is an illusion you want just one illusion to appear stable and that it will be there. Your choices involce alot more people then just you and you feel that you are carrying more then your load. There is help to be received, but sometimes you just have to ask.

I am in the midst of wild Manhattan craziness and trying to get everyone on the smae page and this can be quite challenging. Yet, none of this really matters and the family we create is the most important thing. I want to be more giving and more living, but I need to make more space inside of myself and remove more clutter that is coming to ths surface. My life has to be order if anything else is to mean anything. Some things seem promising and then fade like a shooting star while others blaze like a sun that we can't seem to see at times. I don't want to be new age or old age I just want to be the present age. I just want to see my way out of the maze of the mind thru surrendering the things beyond my control. I want to be generous, but I don't want to be trampled on. I want to reunite myself to my true core essence and then this whole journey becomes much easier. Give me the rock of God's love and let me stop searching and realize that I have always had what I was searching, but I just can't seem to realize beyond an intellectual understanding.

I am not sure if I can write or I can't write but I certainly know how to struggle when there is nothing to struggle with. I am fighting invisible men and women that I have made real out of my own fears and insecurities and taking on the fears of others and I just need to purge all the nonsense so that I can soar like the American eagle that has has shackles placed on its wings.

Every Now and Then

I want to run down the street stark naked yelling the most intense nonsense that will pop up in my head that moment. I walk around NYC and I can feel as if people are waiting to explode, but instead they trudge on instead of letting it out. We are all part of shaking things up and we have to allow ourselves to get a little crazy every now and then in a positive way, otherwise we become ingrained into conforming to the point that is almost impossible for our souls to be a peace. I have been having so many special moments that is really hard to go in details about any of them. I sometimes feel a bit overwhelmed by NYC, but it forces me to grow and be balanced and gives me opportunity to bring so many different types of people together. The past moves forward into the present and future at the same time. I wander around New York City wearing no contact lenses and the streets have numbers and names that I have to squint so that I can see. I truly do get a sense of people's energies and I just follow the energy that is align with my path. We all desire an occassional distraction myself included.

I am only capable of being focused on God to a certain extent. I am not a sage or even a wise man. I merely a fool desiring to be more foolish. The foolish ones seem to love deepest. I have to give myself long deep looks and be the change that I want to see in this world. It is said so many times to be that change, but I actually have more of an understanding of what that means. I desire to be selfless but at times it makes me nervous. I still cling to an identity, but I am allowing changes to manifest as they are meant to be.

I want to tell you stories of street magicians and junkies and gypsies and people that play the violin that very few can hear or choose to hear. People that dance like their body might split open at any moment and trees that remain perfectly still despite all the craziness possible. I wonder what else I can say with words that can drive a poitn home. I have been having quite a few women retunring from my past that are allowing me to examine certain emotions and feelings. Life is a comedy often mistaken for a tragedy. Yet the best comedies have tears.

Hey there

Been out of touch as of late. So many things and people whirling around me in Nyc and it is hard to formulate it all into words and tell of things that might be of enjoyment and upliftment to whoever reads my blog. I really love NyC and the vast amounts of people that I have an opportunity to interact with. Not a day goes by that I don't have mulitiple blasts from the past of different locations or different periods in my life. I miss so many of you guys and the roles that you have played in the movie of my life. I really do view life as movie and God as the director/producer and me merely having a little bit role to be expereinced. I am in Brooklyn right now dealing with apartment stuff which is a very new experience for me on multiple levels. Just remember before you move the landlord needs a certificate of occupancy and in certain places they don't do it and it might mean that the place does not have proper ventaliation.

In other news I am falling more deeply in love with Union Square Park and central park on the weekends. I see the world changing rapidly and my mind experience a deeper stillness. I want to be immersed in the love that is all things around me. I want to know the formless that is the essence of all living things. I am not a guru merely someone on the path trying to find my inner bliss and happy to meet people that encourage me to go deeper within my core being.

I swear that I still crack jokes. A great funny moment from Bonnaroo was rolling out of a girl's car. And telling her thank you for letting me sleep it and that my name was Te'DeVan and I was running for president of the United States. How many of the other candidates have done something like that. It should not be illegal to sleep outside in this country. Trespassing in the 3rd degree puts poor people in jail and the shelters can be some of the most awful places from homeless people that I have spoken to. Government officials should be made to sleep in the shelters and see if they would be comfortable staying there before they can expect others to stay there. We spend too much money or hurting people we don't know and not enough on helping people that we claim to care about. The way we spend our money needs to change and whoever is reading this consider yourself to be the president and give your feedback. Because we need radical change not a lesser of two evils. We are the change that we want to see in the world around us.

Taking the Campaign to the South

So I have been MIA recently I was at Bonnaroo just enjoying myself immensely and following the flow of adventure. I was doing my best imitation of Sean Penn's character from All the Kings Men and stumping ( i think that is the right term) in front of the long lines at the portapottie. The speeches went over quite well for the most part. I can only imagine what the people inside of the bathrooms must have thought. My VP Smiley was having people make juice on his head and Matt Fisher did lots of explainations about we are all in the same band and that everyone is running for president. There was alot of insanity and many worlds colliding. I met a beautiful girl from Mobile, Alabama who wanted to take me back home and it almost worked out that way. Instead I met two marvelous Ivy league lesbians who took me to the suburbs of conneticut. We had great conversation about life and I did healing on the one from Harvard who had a bad sunburn. I had a ride fall thru last minute and made a ghetto cardboard sign early in the morning. I am back in NYC and working hard to bring the Dharma pad together though hopefully not too hard. We are all heading towards a whole new world and everyone's ability to be anything is becoming more obvious everyday. I just want to give a big shout out to "ask a gay man" I could only imagine being gay in Kentucky is not that easy.

I miss all of my friends in San Fran, Santa Cruz and the rest of Northern California. Alot of amazing people to meet and connect with in NYC. Everyone the Dharma Pad will be open starting July 1st and much love to Sonny for plunging yourself head first into your spiritual path.

Straight to the POINT OF Things

Humor is time removed from Pain. For instance when I spent a good two days feeling very sick in India it felt awful, but in retrospect I find it to be quite hiliarious. I recently have become obcessed with the idea of cute southern girls that use the word Preggers. They are real simple and just want to be married and preggers. I think that preggers is my word of the month. I am not special please do not think me special. I am the same as you and everyone that you know. There is no difference between me and your local bank teller, stripper, police officer, Iraqi citizen, etc.... I am finding people and things that I knew existed but seem to elude my grasp. I am slippery like quickie Koala. I am going to Tennesse and I am feeling that I don't want to talk about change or healing as much rather I prefer to experience these things. People seem to want to talk about this stuff, but are not willing to do expereince it. Get out of your own way and let God fly that plane or drive that car. There will always be someone more out there then you.

We have thoughts that pull us on numerous directions and we are the ones who are capable of seeing things as they are once we can remove our biases that have been programmed into us. I want to find Judy Garland somewhere over the rainbow and tell her I have a yellow brick road with her name on it. Get off the heroin and the cocaine it will only break everyones heart and make you more insane. Been around quite a few druggies lately and there anguish is devastating. We need to wake up out of out bubbles. Manic mysterious and completely delirious and just don't take yourself way too serious.

There will be death and there will be life and nothing really separates one from the other. There will be dancing and stillness hunger and fullness and all of it is some sort of experience that we have at some point or another. I don't care for politics I care for people. The problem is that politics doesn't care for people merely it cares to preserve itself. We all have to look at the next person we see and let us see the person that we most love and admire in their face.

The War stops when the internal conflict stops. Something is happening here and what it is clear is that there will be a whole lot of shaking going on. The rubber band will snap and the bubble will burst and there will be many people with great thurst and many people being driven off in a hearse such is the curse when there is imbalance. There is no reason to be sad because the sun will always come out tommorrow. Tommorrow tommorrow I love you tommorrow your only a few weeks or maybe months away.

First Batch of Campaign Videos

The Impossible Prez - Trailer #1


The Impossible Prez - War Room #1


On the Campaign Trail: San Francisco #1


On the Campaign Trail: San Francisco #2


On the Campaign Trail: San Francisco #3


On the Campaign Trail: San Francisco #4


On the Campaign Trail: San Francisco #5


Coming Soon: The Te'DeVan Presidential Video Library

Why Do I Care So Much What You Think

I am not sure why it is that maybe 8,000 people can tell you that you are amazing and it will feel good, but ultimately you pick out one person and decide that if they tell you that you are amazing then it means the entire world to you. Why and how is that we pick this person and bring them into our lives or push them out of our lives. We can't really seem to do one without the other. I am in uptown NYC which is not my usual stomping grounds, but these are not my usual days either. I still seem to do things to make myself jealous of things that I don't even care about because there is a part of me that seems to enjoy the slight anguish that causes me. I continue to become more aware of the unecessary challenges I place before myself and I am focused on just allowing them to fall by the wayside. We are part of an ongoing spontaneous Jazz song in the city of NYC and following our heart and meeting the friends of friends and intersecting at the most perfect moments as the clarinet and trumpet combine with a stand up bass that bring us to a point where it all makes sense. That all of the rational thought is not so rational.

There is something about a rainy night in NYC and random couchsurfing that only a few people have ever gotten to experience. We are all part of a play exiting and entering as some unseen force behind the curtains sets up the stage for the next scene. I am about to enter the next scene of my life and it will be one displayed before the masses of the public and hopefully it helps at least one other person to better understand themeselves. May they see a reflection of themselves within me and may I do the same with them. It is not about me but about team and the team is the human race and it is not a battle but a cipher that most be stirred so that we can have a lasting change. The cipher must swell within us and move outward. I must surrender the I so that I can just be a drift in streams of life that show anything can truly happen if we are open to it. Here I am and there you are very close and yet very far. I want to grab you thru the computer screen and slam you down in the most gentle and sensual way possible. I want to get thru all the illusions that we place before each other and see you for the omniprescent soul that bounds from your being that pulled me towards you and keeps my spirit with you and has unforseen surprises that will better help me to find the boundless love that is at the core of our being. All of us just want to know that love and somehow we settle for something less then that love. I am the love and in a look there is love and in a thought there is a love that is sometimes obstructed. Go beyond that thought and may those emotions be released and let your heart take where it will and may I find you when I will.

Being A Bridge for Connections

Each day in NYC is some sort of intense version of "this is your life" for me. Everywhere I go I am running into someone that I met at some point at my life on my journey. I have to go thru the catalog and figure exactly how I know them. For the other person it is usually a little easier. I think the signs I carry and my general height seem to narrow it down for most people. Life comes at you so fast in this city especially and it comes from all different angles. It is so important to always be on your toes in NYC. Things move so quickly here and I always find myself caught in highly new scenarios that allow me to connect to some of the most amazing people. I have been running into people from Charleston, South Carolina, Key West, San Fran, Coachella, Bonnaroo an other amazing musical festivals. I love playing the role of help people to connect to other people. People use my sign as an excuse to start conversations with other people. Basically I act as a bridge to help people to connect and I really love the role I play and helping to establish relationships.

I want all my friends back on the west coast to know that I miss you and I send my best and to all the people that have shared a moment with me (however brief) thank you for sharing that truest part of yourself with me. It encourages me to do the same. The walls are coming down and though facism seems to be gaining momentum it is actually losing its stranglehold on our country. We must remove the walls that we have within ourselves and it will then start to happen in our society.

1 degree of separation from Kevin Bacon

I ended up meeting two awesome cats from Columbia University while visiting Stanford. They are now both back in NYC and I have been kicking it with them. Humorously enough one of their friends recently met Kevin Bacon. Ah yes 6 degrees of Kevin Bacon which really only turns out to be one degree from multiple angles. My blinddate episode which took place 4 years ago was with a girl from Columbia (many blessings wherever you maybe) and I dedicated the first episode to the legalization of dancing in NYC. That's right NYC has some weird law that makes it illegal to dance at many bars and at certain times has actually arrested people for dancing. This brought about the DLF (dance liberation Front). Anyway back in 2003 I was stopped from dancing at bowery bar because they did not have a cabaret license. I realized that I needed to do something about it and an opportunity was provided to go on blinddate. I ended up going back to hang with the girl from the date and she was across the street from where Kevin Bacon used to live. This was all 4 years ago. Recently it has been reairing on television and people keep in NYC keep mentioning it. And just a few moments ago I met a Columbia student who had been hanging out with Kevin Bacon last night. Once again Kevin Bacon the dancing prophet and myself have almost crossed paths (for those of you who don't understand the dancing prophet reference see the movie "Footloose").

I Have a gift But I am not the solution

Last night it occurred to me while at a party that though it is a wonderful thing to do the work that I do or rather be the vessel that I am for healing energy there is an idea that I just wave my hands around/ do a prayer and all problems are gone. I am not capable of doing such a thing. I a merely someone that is capable of holding a space for people that desire to let go of their pain. I am not the guru I am merely someone that could perhaps be of some small assistance on your journey. Ultimately you must have desire to let go of your pain. I view myself as a man who stumbled upon his greatest asset within my own being and desire to help other people do the same thing.

I do not have a quick fix end all be all thing that I do. I merely can remind you that you don't need all the things that you are carrying around on your shoulders. You can then chose to heed me advice and let go or you can keep trucking along business as usual. We are both reflections of each other is how I view the world. I try to be aware of some of the things that world mirrors back at me.

Sometimes the most wonderous energy will pour thru my being, but that is because there is a desire from the person that I am do healing work on to accept it. They don't need belief as much as they need desire in order to become more in balance. I am constantly striving to find a deeper inner peace that allows me not be shaken when the world around me becomes challenging. Everything that you need is within you and starts with Making your mind quiet and listening to your inner guidance.

LEt s go Old School

Make me laugh I need s chuckle don't be so serious tell me why Paris Hilton may actually be the Buddha or maybe she is Jesus with even better fashion sense. We all need better fashion sense. We need to find the G spot and sell it on e-bay to I Bankers that work on wall street. We all need to find 21 Jump street. I am Johnny Deeps deep raging infierno manifested as an angry rapping jew that has a weird healing gift that makes little sense to his rational mind, but still he is forced to acknowledge that effects people.

Better dancing will lead to better sex and sentence fragments are hotter then a climax that last 3 hours. There is dancing bear somewhere in India who is being outsourced to be the surrogate mother for an American bear. I am CHuck palanuick from fight club, but not quite that angry or violent. Zombies walk to slow to catch me unless they are the newer zombies. I have found a prophecy inside of me that offers me the hope that I always wanted. Can you really get a contact buzz from weed.

I think people should give money for rehab and college. I want to be on the Mayflower and tell the pilgrims to go back. A man in the room with me is talking about his friends sleeping with his sister. He feels uncomfortable with guys sleeping with his sister. Do you feel comfortable with guys sleeping with your sister or would you feel better knowing your ex-girlfriend is sleeping with her.
Sleep depravation makes for entertaining writing. Sometimes I let my mind wander and these are the words that are unleashed. Yes I have a little bit of an edge and it comes out at times.

Find me Barabra Streisand and tell her she was great in Beaches and then she is the wind beneath your wings and that the movie helped you transform your life and that you will forever be in her debt. (of course I know is Bette Midler what type of Jew do you take me for). When the going gets weird remember that the weird turn pro and that I know the best pros.

Imposter College Students and Myspace People

There is a girl at Stanford or rather I should say there was a girl at Stanford named Azia Kim and she pretended to be a freshmen living at Stanford for 8 months in the dorms. They finally caught her as the school year was coming to an end. I love the idea she just decided that she was going to get an education at this school and was not going to let the small detail of not getting in stop her from doing just that.

We should all be so bold in going for what we want. I desire to have her on one of the campaign buses as things start rolling. On the other hand I am not a big fan of women that have webcame and want to be my friend on myspace. How do they find me? And since I meet so many people I always have to check out their profile to make sure that I don't actually know them. Usually I am correct but on few occassions it was women I had actually met who had a picture that was a bit sexed up. And now some of the webcam girls look like regular people that just want to chat.

The worst imposters are usually politicians because they pretend to make choices in the interest of the American public and only a few of them actually do that.

I'm Digging Hard

So I am at Stanford after leaving San Fran accept now I am wondering if I am facing the old cliche "I left my heart in San Francisco", but San Fran went to Seattle and this girl kind of came out nowhere and we both snuck up on each other. She is smart, sexy, funny, and she makes me feel high and smile when I let her seep into my being. I want to call her right now, but I just want to keep feeling her energetically and I just want to keep feeling and being with her soul. All of us really do have an ability to talk without speaking on the phone. All of us have feelings that we hold back myself included because we don't want to be caught out there all alone thinking the other person would catch us, but God's love always catches us.

The people that make us feel the best are also the people that can cause us to feel the worst. Life is an ebb and flow that leads to this journey. I am trying to allow myself more time to reflect and to be in clear state and speak from my heart. Though I am an open person there are still parts of me that are closed off and those parts need to open up and someone comes along and gives you a prod and brings all of that to the surface. We don't need to suffer we can just love deeply and let it take us wherever we need to be. We can try and rationalize our feelings or we can just feel them and be honest about what we feel and that is what I desire to remember for all of time.

New Avenues To New Possibilities

I want to say something at this exact moment that pierces right thru the shell of the mundane world. That hits right underneath the surface of a world that is filled with endless possibilities including an unlikely Presidential campaign. Yesterday I did my first interview with a San Francisco Newspaper that should be coming out in Early July. I have a meeting with a production company on Wednesday who has a serious interest in producing "The Impossible Prez". I very excited but also very calm about all the current things going on around me.

I will keep everyone posted on the progress of the campaign and the television/documentary series that will be in conjunction with it. I am working with some extremely talented people and San Fran has been a world of blessings for me. I really do love this town and soaking up the time that I have left before I leave you.
I was at the Bay to Breakers campaign and I had an amazing with a few of my friends and the most amazing and wonderful people that were met along the way. We are entering into a whole new day where people truly realize that anything can happen if your open to new possibilities.

We must constantly allow ourselves to grow in new and different ways and these new routines will create new adventures. To quote Tom Petty "I am learning TO Fly, but ain't got wings." We are on the brink of a whole new way of going about things. I would once again like to thank all the people that have been spreading the buzz about the campaign and sending links to the youtube videos that have resonated with you.
This is campaign aimed at many different types of people not all aspects of it will always appeal to you initially but may it always inspire you to look at old things in new ways.

Embracing the Higher Self and letting the smaller self go

Sometimes when I write something I leave out details and the way that I describe things might cause people to understand the event in a way that is different from how it actually transpired. I always try to write as truthfully as possible though I have an ego that is very clever in regards to protecting itself. I still make assumptions in life that entirely false and want everyone who reads my blog to know that. I am on the path like everyone else and I have not reached full realization and shed my attachment to my identity. I still very wrapped up in my identity and sometimes after when I get scared about being vulnerable I immerse myself more deeply in what some call their "small self" (the big self bigger higher consciousness) because it is something that my rational mind strives to maintain.

I have been arrogant before in my life and I can tell you that I will be arrogant and sometimes it is very intentional and sometimes it is not intentional. I have had moments of profound humility and I desire to maintain that humility on some level, but my ego desires greatly to keep its small identity and make itself the focus of my existence. The ego can never be satisfied and it leads to intense ambition. Ultimately I desire to let go of my ambition because it does not bring me deep joy, but rather temporary satisfaction with temporary pleasure that I quickly forget. Yet, my mind craves these temporary pleasures and wants me to keep chasing them like some sort of Mad Hatter. One day soon I will drop all of these desires and be in the deepest state of ecstasy that will never have me chasing temporary pleasures. It does not mean that I will not have them, but merely that they will not be any sort of focus for me.

Where Are My Bibilical Quotes

I think I am going thru Biblical quote withdraw. I never had anyone write longer responses then the length of my 2 previous blogs combined. Sure it seemed a little odd, but everything in my life is a little odd to say the least. Plus I really enjoyed Reverend Steve's responses. Admit Reverend Steve you need Biblical Pundits so that you can be at your comedic best. For those of you who never payed close attention. I was getting more comments then ever on my blog. Though most of them were biblical quotes. Sonny bring it back just like the Godfather and include your own personal interpretation of scripture and Reverend Steve will have even more opportunities to be at his comedic best. What was Muhummad Ali without Frazier. Sure he joked around that Frazier shouldn't even show up for the fight, but we need both Sonny and Reverend Steve. In the immortal of that famous referee in boxing "lets get it on".

In other news I will be back on the east coast for a while starting May 28th so keeping your eyes peeled for me in Union Square Park. Also one of my campaign wizards is being seduced by a Belgium Campaign that is offering free blowjobs. First chocolate and now blowjobs what will these brillant people come up with next. In other news everyone in San Fran I meet is convinced a huge earthquake is coming or maybe I am convincing them. Either way I feel strongly that this earth shaking will reflect and huge political and social change that is about to manifest in this country and around the world. The last time San Fran had a big earthquake the Berlin Wall went down back in 1989 and everyone says we are overdue. My feeling is that it will happen in the next 3 months. There are have been some odd weather patterns here but that could also be go old global warming.

In happier news 16th mission celebrated its 4th year of Thursday night outdoor spoken poetry/rants/music/comedy and just people coming together to say what is their minds.
I send everyone the best and keep doing your thing wherever you maybe right now in the world.

A Dharma Pad is Coming

I am in the process of getting a pad with a bunch of my friends somewhere on the fringes of NYC. It will consist of some of the most amazing people you can imagine. It will have bunkbeds/lofts for sleeping a huge living space and a love making room. Rent will go for about $300 a month and I am looking for substance free people whom are creative. They are people on a spiritual quest of some sorts and seeking to find a deeper inner peace. They will come from all walks of life. There will also be a constant stream of visitors. It will be an amazing group effort to manifest a spiritual and peaceful version of Andy Warhol's the factory.

We will have the best and brightest couchsurfers from all over the world coming to stay with us. If you are thinking about moving to NYC in the next few weeks contact me thru my myspace account.

What Will It take For The Country To Really Change

I have had quite few conversations with my friends in regards to what it will take to bring about serious change in this country. I feel that the vast majority of Americans are fighting for the nicest room on the Titanic and nobody wants to address the issue of the large hole in the ship. We have the capability to fix the hole but instead we spend our energy in extreme exercises of futility and proclaim that we have that right as Americans. Recently I was informed that many of our honey bees have been dying and I feel this should be a huge red flag and one of the biggest headlines. Einstein said that once the bees go we as species will go shortly afterwards.

I am in San Francisco pondering honey bees becoming extinct and the strain the strain that a huge earthquake would have on our country. We can't keep going the way we are going, but very few people are willing to make the lifestyle changes that are needed to bring us back into balance with nature. We really need to increase hemp production and start using hemp for paper so that we can conserve our trees. We need to make some large changes across the board and they need to be made right now.

All of us must be the change in our own lives and the nation will soon follow. We must wake up from our rampant consuming slumber so that we can see the amazing beauty that nature contains and that we all can appreciate by just being still in our mind.

My Campaing Wizards

We are focused on major change in this world and I really do want peace, but I have been taking the pulse of this country based on its purchases. Lose weight, Great Sex, Be happy and fall asleep at night. These are the keys to the campaign trail and then we can focus on the love and stillness of mind and all the things that I truly hold dear. We need to bridge the gap between the people who vote and the people that are in this country right now. 180,00,000 people did not vote in the last election. We are going to give them what they want like Lenin in Russia. We will offer the new version of peace, bread, and land. I think this was the campaign that led to a successful revolution and we will win and Karl Rove will be scratching his head because he galvanized the Christian right. We will do the same thing with the apathetic. I have come to light a small fire under 180,000,000. Now is the time and we are the people to shake it up. You want to be entertained America? I've got what you've been looking for my friends.

I want to talk About Ad that has inspired me

It is in the Castro section of San Fran and has a bunch of buff guys and it says "Hot Sex Without Crystal Hell YEah". How bad must the Meth problem be or why don't we have more ads like this one. How about "Lose weight without Cocaine Hell Yeah" or maybe "Get really blissed out without excasty Hell yeah." There is a great honesty about this campaign that other campaigns don't have. I am still wondering who said yeah this is the way we should go in our anti meth campaign. We have to look at the reasons people are doing certain drugs and explain that we can achieve that same outcome without using substances. It is a very wonderful idea even if most anti-drug campaigns are based upon the 80's idea of Nancy Regan saying "Just Say No". I have to be honest I have never done drugs, but Nancy made me want to consider trying it. I really imagine somewhere in white suburban neighborhoods at least one less line of coke was snorted because of these ads involving Nancy.

In the Presidential Campaign we are going to run alot of honest ads. We are going to be everyone's favorite punchline and be proud of it. We need to be innovative and bold and take plenty of chances. We may be the shadow of the dark horse in this race, but we are going straight to the top like a used condom in a jacuzzi. "Hot Sex in a jacuzzi without drinking Hell Yeah". Ultimately America wants to be happier, thinner, with a better sex life and be able to fall asleep at night. This consists of the majority of drugs that the pharmacy companies sell to Americans that are rampant consumers. Our Presidential Campaign will offer all of this to pull people in and though these are not my greater goals by any stretch of the imagination it is certainly a starting point to draw interest to campaign that is highly under publicized at this present moment.

revolution is the evolution of humanity,
President Te'DeVan

Slacker Prophet at Coachella 2007

Part One


Part Two

The benefit of being a mirror

I recently had a conversation with a young college student who goes to UCLA and I am not saying this to put down UCLA it just happened to be where she went to school. I asked her what she really wanted out of life and she said "To be Rich". I then asked her why and she replied "So I can have as many Channel Pursues as I want". She then asked me the same question "I said to find unconditional love" (typical spiritual healer hippie response). She then said that she was shallow and that I was so deep and then in some way started to feel bad about being shallow. I did not judge her, but she began to judge herself by being forced to think about things that she chooses not to think about. Yet, the girl was amazingly sweet despite everything she said and is merely a product of the world around her. If she grew up in certain other culture she might have said "To have a big flock of sheep" and maybe so that she could then give them to her future children.

All of us need to realize what truly matters to us and then we will be help other people to do the same. It does not mean they will change immediately, but eventually a change will take place. We all have to act as mirrors to society. It is not about lecturing, but merely being a mirror in which your very presence forces people to reconsider things that they have taken for granted. Last night for at least one girl I was able to act as a mirror.

Taking Back Our Own Personal Power

We want to speak up but we hold back and we need to start letting go and let go in a gentle manner, but we need to let other people know how we really feel especially the people that are supposedly in charge of our best interests. We have handed over all of our power and now is the time to find our voice and our individual power. We must break through our judgments of each other and learn to see each other as the same. All of us are a part of the solution. All of us need to find the change within ourselves. We can't expect the revolution to happen externally if it does not happen internally. we need to find change within our own being.

All of us only have a small semblance of what we are capable of doing. We have truly amazing gifts and we need to collectively start realizing our gifts and that will bring about a paradigm shift and help to restore a balance that we need to find with our ourselves and our environment. We all must take responsibility for our own personal power and realize our true voice that exists inside of our core being.

We must keep our hearts open and do our best to clear our minds of the junk that the culture keeps spoon feeding us. We need to break from the culture so that we can gain more of sense of who we really are and how we can bring about a better future.

WHAT'S GOING ON Right Now

I am slightly off of UCLA's campus chilling a Coop. I had a connection here to a wonderful girl named Laura who I met thru I a great guy named Zack who I had met at the Sundance film festival. He saw me on campus and said "Slacker Prophet!". Seems that name is staring to catch on a bit. I stayed in Topanga a couple nights before and that place is so beautiful. I stayed with a great friend of mine from Jersey who moved out to LA as I was heading towards India. I have been running into quite a few people that I met at Coachella or had merely seen me there and decided that they had to talk to me once they saw me on the campus of UCLA. I got a call from Smiley today. He is my VIP. Hey SUnny go to myspace and give him biblical quotes on his comment page on myspace or respond to his poetry on www.walkingenglish.blogspot.com

LA would be amazing if this place got some mass transit system. It is not a town made for a walking man. I got interviewed by a girl last night who was quitting her PHD in Freench Lit to do a documentary. She has never done any film in her life and decided she needed to take this leap. I was truly touched by this move. She wants to take a look at all the different views of Jesus and perople's perceptions. She was 28 but she could have passed for 18 easily.

An amazing girl that I have been dating from San Fran came down and visited me while she was seeing her sister in LA. We both crashed on the couch of Delta Sig. She has such an amazing sense of what really matters and she greatly inspires me. She told me that we are not meant to be with each other, but we still had more to learn from each other. She hit the nail on the head and I was really moved by her realization. Truth is such a wonderful thing. All of us are trying to find a truth that helps to experience peace and understand what we really desire.

My parents also happen to be in LA right now. Alot of my world is convening right here in LA for the moment, but I look forward to getting back to San Fran. I must continue to ride this adventure out til it has run its course. Just like surfing a wave. I miss so many of you guys and I want to vist all of you guys at once. Crazy amounts of love to NYC and Austin. Both of these places have been greatly in my thoughts and I will make back to both in the near future.

The presidential campaign continues to expand and my VP keeps coming up with clever ideas. Bonnaroo will be a place that changes everything for quite a few of my friends. There will be heaps and heaps of miracle healings and that will help out any aspiring president. Papa Neutrino is spreading the word on his radio interviews and things keep moving forward because backwards isn't a option.

THe NAKED MILE WILL COME BACK TO ANN ARBOR. MARK MY WORDS THE ADMINSTRATION AND THE COPS BE DAMMED (DAMMED IN A LOVING WAY) IT WILL BE NAKED TIME IN ANN ARBOR. THE CAMPAIGN WILL BE COMING BACK. THE WHITE HOUSE HERE WE COME. COUCHSURFING IS COMING BACK TO THE THE WHITE HOUSE AND IT WILL BECOME OUR HOUSE. VIVA LA CONCH VIVA LA CONCH.

Don't Call It A Comeback

Some of you might think that the presidential campaign is some sort of joke and that I am not actually serious about this endeavor. You would be very wrong. As we speak the campaign is starting to head into 2nd gear. I am not sure what the heck that means but I know firmly that we are heading into 2nd gear and there is no reason to have any fear because me and amazing crew of merry pranksters are very near. We are pulling out all the stops. We will soon be rasing funds for a small fleet of vegetable oil buses and A-team of very unique people from many different walks of life. It happens one person at a time and many different things are coming together. Just to let you all know Papa Neutrino has agreed to be secretary of transportation. Some of you know this man and others of you don't, but he is most famous for building a raft out of scrap parts and going across the Atlantic ocean. The man has will power and alot of courage to say the least. He told me that this campaign must happen. This is not a man to be argued with in any respect. If he says it must happen then indeed it must happen.

All of you are a part of this presidential race. 120 million people voted in the last white house race give or take a few million. Our current population is 300 million I want to tap into the 180 million people who did not vote. I want to show America that in this age even if you don't have much money you to can run for President of the United States. Lets help to put the word "servant" back into public servant. I would like to thank everyone for their support so far on the early part of the campaign trail. I would also like to thank everyone who told even just one person about this idea. There is a tipping point and we are rapidly reaching that point. Never doubt the power of just one voice to help change everything in the blink of an eye. A cover of Rolling Stone magazine will be just one of the markers that this campaign will reach. You can count on it my friends. The people will be heard and politics will forever be changed.

The Coolest Hipster Ever

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Looking at My Fears

Sometimes I fear that I am all wrong and sometimes I fear that I am mostly right and neither is completely true and yet both somehow make me a little nervous. We are all part of something that is much larger then any of us and we lose sight of the bigger picture. We become swallowed up entirely by our small dramas that mean nothing. Spending time in India help to put struggle into perspective. I have no problems and I never have had any problems. Only my mind thought there was a problem, but it always worked itself out. I am starting to realize how this is a waking dream and our thoughts are always shaping this dream that we live in.

New people enter our lives when we allow ourselves to make room for them. If we want something it will come our way, but when it does come let in and don't eye it suspiciously. I always get just what I needed and I as I want less the more I find myself receiving. We can't imagine or understand how we touch people's lives. We just have to allow ourselves to be present in this moment and offer our heart to other people and they will pass that on to others.

People can dislike or loathe George Bush and his group, but if people would refuse to pick up their weapons then they would have no power. By hating him we give him power and we focus too much of our energy on it and it drains us of our creative ability. I don't like what he does, but instead I focus on being the best person I can be at every moment and focusing on the things that matter to me. May I continue to pass on as many blessings as possible.

All of IT is Happening Now

I am not sure what the hell I mean by this statement I just know it to be true. I can feel alot of things swirling around me and I've made peace with alot of things that used to make me more nervous and now I have a deep calm about. Truthfully part of mind is uncomfortable with how at peace I am with alot of things, but I am learning to accept this as well and just keep being. All of us have a natural disposition and mine has usually been to work too hard and make things much more challenging then they need to be. When I used to train hard I would usually cause myself physical injury by not giving myself enough rest and relaxation. Striving is a wonderful thing, but you also have to surrender a bit as well and I had a really hard time with surrendering.

Age and experience has taught me this lesson time and time again and that the universe has its own time schedule and to fully enjoy and immerse myself in the moment that I am in right now. I might not be granted another one and appreciate the peace that I am having right now. I am listening to the sounds of recording whales and dolphins as I write this to you. They really do make an amazing music and it stirs up a beautiful feeling of solitude. I imagine myself in the middle of the pacific ocean on a raft with Papa Neutrino. The ocean is truly amazing and we are part of that amazing ocean.

I am coming back to NYC and so much is up in the air and I am just going to feel my way thru carefully and slowly and listen to the guidance that I receive. We all end up exactly where we are supposed to be and the internal work that we do puts us on the right situation. These are the days of miracles is a thought that keeps bouncing around in my head. What if .............? I keep thinking what it is that might be in store for me and the world I live in. I feel a quiet right now before the storm and when the storm hits I will be still be internally feeling the same quiet. COuld it be an earthquake, a miracle, another war, a terrorist attack,or all of the above. It could be everything and anything, but I feel something and I know that it is written on the wall. I just can't seem to get close enough to read it.

Everyone take care and I'll see you all soon.

"Hot Sex Without Crystal, Hell Yeah!"

In case you are wondering what the heck this is about I found a giant advertisement in the Castro district of San Fran. I was laughing hysterically, but it also made my mind think how bad is the crystal Meth problem? It must be one of the hugest epedemics since crack hit the scene, but maybe worse. Imagine driving thru the suburbs or anywhere and seeing a billboard that reads "Hot sex without Cocaine, Hell Yeah", or "Hot Sex Without Viagra, Hell Yeah". We could discuss what this means for a long time, but suffice to say I figure some of you would get a laugh from the ad at the very least. At first I thought the ad was talking about crystals, but I soon realized they meant crystal Meth. Still someone somewhere must have thought the same thing.

In other news I love San Fran and I would like to mention an Oscar Wilde quote "Its and odd thing they say but everyone who disappears is said to be seen in San Francisco". I have become one of those people. In other news yesterday was the celebration of the first man launched into Space and I celebrated it the only way possible other then going into space myself I did the next best thing. I went to a NASA rave party outside of Santa Cruz. I fell asleep in some pillows and my buddy Jordan could not find me, but I found a giant bus and hopped a ride back. I will be back in NYC April 18th for 8 days.

Te'DeVan

The Impossible Presidency

http://www.theimpossibleprez.com/

Missing the Bigger Picture

I always find that most of the time we are missing the bigger picture and thinking that we have figured out the bigger picture. Once we truly realize the bigger picture there is no more drama in our lives period. We have a greater understanding of the small role we play in life and there many other things going on that we are not aware of it. There are always many unseen forces at work in any give situation. Things that seem wonderful or that seem awful are viewed differently once more information is received.

Even though I have brought more of my focus onto God/Love I still realize that my mind remains distracted on issues and events that don't actually feed my soul. I am letting go of these things , but all of this is an on going process and there are so many unseen forces and sometimes we can sense them , but most of the time we are oblivious. I do believe there is an inherent order in the universe and that are basic understanding of natural laws is not completely true. Quantum physics seems to be offering a scientific understanding that we may be missing something in our understanding of the world around us.

I look forward in the near future to have my brain waves measured while I am doing healing work and for the results upon the person I am working upon to also be measured. Our machines don't measure everything, but I feel confident that they measure enough to show that more study into this sort of thing is well merited. John of God is a great example of someone that science should be studying. Yet, many of them shun him or fear him and his work. Most scientists are missing the bigger picture. All of this is coming to a huge turning point because the fate of our species will reside in our ability to better understand ourselves and the imbalance inside of us plays out on our planet.

I am keeping greater focus on God/love throughout the day and if we all do that then we will be able to find more balance in our lives. In finding this balance we will be able to see the world around us more clearly. Each one of us should strive to better understand ourselves and that will help us to see the world more clearly and get closer to seeing the bigger picture of life.

Ghandi Fasted

Now that I am on day three I have been feeling some fascinating feelings running thru me and I realize how much I eat that my body is still try to catch up to and process. Your body has at least 3 days of back-up that it hasn't worked out of your system and some cases more. I was fairly amazed at this simple revelation. If I can break my attachment to food I will be in a higher state of bliss. I am always thinking about food and at times my appetite feels a bit like a bottomless pit. I always get nervous when people want to share food with me because I am inclined to eat all of it if I don't pay careful attention.

There is nothing wrong with a healthy appetite, but I found that I would use food as a distraction. Something to do when I did not know what else to do. Food can actually be quite a drug. American in particular has quite an odd relationship with food. In 3rd world countries nobody has eating disorders and trying to explain Bulimia is like trying to explain the idea of peace and mediation to the current white house regime.

All of the things in our life connect even though we can't see those connections. Beyond all these thoughts the idea of Ghandi Fasting to bring about peace somehow started to make alot more sense to me. I never fully understood the power of fasting. I do consume lemons, maple syrup and cayenne pepper which is pretty well known amongst people that do this sort of stuff. My goal is 5 days which would be good starting point. We live off more then just food and doing this brief fast has helped me to see that simple and wonderful fact thru my own personal experience. There is a power of mind and spirit that is realized when we start to break our attachment to food. As I kid I thought the idea of 24 hours was unbearable and there were moments on the first day where I got a little cranky and now I am starting to hit a groove. Cleanse the body, mind and soul.

Did I tell you guys that miss all of you and I want to have you all in the same place at one time or just discover how to become full omnipresent.

The Celibacy thing hit a minor bump

Okay I fell harder then Bill Clinton hanging out at the Miss America after party. I had actually been celibate for about 9 months and the moment I realized it and made it my focus I fell off, but I rather enjoyed the fall so to speak and she was really sweet. I met her in park. I feel like that seems to happen to me alot meeting women in parks. Maybe I should stay out of parks and then I won't falter anymore. On the bright side I am on my 3rd day of not eating and I am actually feeling really good. No food and great sex sounds like the new hot diet sweeping the nation.

I still want to have a girlfriend and settle into a bit more of a routine. I am coming back to NYC April 18th and will be Union Square Park in the early afternoon for anyone that wants to know. I also want to thank all the people out there who are helping people to overcome cancer thru diet, herbs, and energy work. I am still in San Francisco and really happy to be here. Just so you know the presidential campaign will be picking up quite soon. There are changes ahead my friends and we just have to keep following our bliss and occasionally enjoying our stumbles and fumbles. But the stumbles and fumbles make life great as long as we don't try to pretend they didn't happen. Lets just be honest without trying to be vicious. Honesty with sincere kindness.

When People Remind Us of Other PEople and Celibacy

This is a really interesting part of life that encourages people to project tremendous amounts of emotions and feelings on someone that they just met. Somehow this person is going to replace this other person that they remind you of. Maybe the other passed away or maybe you don't talk to them anymore, but this person came along and they totally remind you of your former love, friend, brother, sister, etc....

So many of our feelings are caused by the association we have with something and have very little to do with who this person is in your life. Last night I had an intensive conversation with a girl about how I didn't want to have sex unless I was in love and she told me that she has hard time having sex when emotions are involved. We found ourselves in a bit of a standstill. I figured that this whole "No Sex" made me intriguing and quite odd. I am sure that "no sex" could actually become a more ambitious guys way of getting laid. Fortunately or unfortunately I actually mean or at least in this present moment. I can honestly say I want a girlfriend it has been 4 years and I am reaching a point of not ever wanting my sex to be detached from emotions.

Emotions are actually my favorite part of sex and maybe I am an emotional junkie, but if they can't bring me to tears with their heart then I don't want it. Thru my mediation I have become more sensitive and of course I still yearn for sex at times, but I yearn for a different type of sex. Last night was an interesting reminder of that fact. On some funny level I found that my being unavailable to a girl who was emotionally not connected to her feelings greatly increased her interest in me.

Of course there is part of me that thinks I am merely insane and that I should push away this whole crazy idea of only having sex when I am in love. It says "Maybe you want fall in love"or "Maybe you won't fall in love with someone who loves you back". This of course might cause fear and then cause a person to settle. I have my goal and I am not settling and to increase my will power I have recently started a 5 day fast. It is a fast on many levels and it will help to stay more focused and be less distracted.

Sex with Pirates

I once had a really good friend of mine and she was very proud that the boy she was seeing called himself a pirate. She had such excitement in her voice about this fact. It did not last too long and in then end he slept with her cousin and spent her money on drugs. She was upset and I kept thinking he did exactly what I would expect a pirate to do. We love people for our certain reasons and then we end up resenting them for those same reasons.

Often I tell people don't get upset with your dog because it is not a cat or your cat because it is not a dog. All of us are perfect in our ways and we all play our own roles in this drama called life. Some of us are aware of our roles to some extent while other people don't have much of any awareness of what role they play. These days I have started to surrender more and more I become less upset by most things after coming back from India. It takes a place or a moment sometime to put things into pespective and India has given me that gift and I am utilizing quite strongly since I got back.

San Fran is My Mistress

Of course I miss NYC but San Fran is a mistress that is just so enticing these days and 40 degrees doesn't excite me all that much. When your hot your hot and right now NYC is not quite so hot or even luke warm. It seems a late spring and probably a Indian Summer or maybe an India summer and temperatures will feel like 115 degrees on a couple of days. It will be a brutal heat index. Groundhog Phil move over because crazy nomad Te'DeVan is making weather predictions.

I also have desire to start drinking women's breast milk. I desire that the woman have a vegan organic diet and I am willing to pay $5 for 4 ounces. I am so over the cow thing after my time in India. I want real women's breast milk and she is still vegan if she drinks her own breast milk or anyone else's breast milk for that matter. A Dharma Pad shall be made soon. I am planning on heading to Coachella and staying out west until the end of April.

In other news today was my first day walking around with my sign and it felt great. God how I missed carrying around my sign. Dependable and durable this might be the greatest sign I have ever had. Have fun today and break some rules!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

You Wanna Know about India Look Into My Eyes

I have quite a few friends that want me to tell them what India was like? I simply can't do it justice but India is certainly in my eyes. When I look in the mirror I can see that they are more Indian. This might sound crazy to some, but certainly not the most radical statement that I have ever made. The cultural shock and weather change have been minimal. I feel that I have alot of work to do and I am more focused on God and trusting. I can expect other people trust more if I won't do the same. I missed all of you guys and now most of us or only at most a mere 3,000 miles apart. We are basically right next door if you are on the east coast. My perspectives were greatly shifted on quite a few things and I just am more focused on making the highest choice that I can make in any given moment.

I am not the same man that left a year and half ago (month and half on linear time). I saw so many things and I am still taking it all in, but the Guru rules India. Whether false or real it is still the Guru who rules rather then the dollar. India is the land of heart and even the con men will have alot of heart or no heart. People in India are one extreme or another nobody seems to be sitting on the fence. I am waking up more to my higher calling and letting Ganesha to take care of the rest. I am making choices faster with less hesitation. I am waking up to life in a land that is reawakening as well. There is a middle path between East and West and it will be found and we will both be victorious as a result. This is a year to bring people together despite differences. I have come to understand more how we are the same. All of us searching for something that feels right something that feels good something that feels good in our heart.

Sending all my love to the people I met in India and look forward to seeing all of my friends spread out throughout the country. In the silence when looking into my eyes you will learn more about India then any of the words I write in my blog.