Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Whatever Is Intended For You Will Find You

Recently my mantra has basically been to be aware of when I am resisting the present moment and creating any form of mental tension about the present moment. I am striving to embrace it or do my best to change if that is possibility. I had a documentary producer run me down today to interview about a potential project. My initial instinct as that many wonderful opportunities will transpire as result of this encounter and it will happen in a relatively short period of time. Regardless I am happy with the progress I have been making in learning how to turn off my mind and not allow to run my life. There are so many fears that society and the world around us program into our heads and I am so happy that I have been letting go of these fears.

I have been feeling that my writing has not been as off the wall and some of my earlier posts and I am sure that will eventually make its way back into my writing. Tonight I had an opportunity to do some healing work on an Aids patient. I desire to do more of this type of work along with working on cancer patients. When I was working on him I gravitated towards the right side of his head. That is where he had serious hemmoraging though it was merely where I became aware of the imbalance. We all have such vast untapped into talents and healing is just one of those talents. I believe that we are entering into a new age which may sound very new agey but I know that we are an evolving species just all things in this world are evolving. By the way I still don't accept that the US airforce doesn't know the difference between a weather balloon and alien spacecraft that has crashed (Roswell, New Mexico) even if ti was the 1940's. Though this being true or not true will not change my life in the general course of the days activities.

Saturday, October 27, 2007

Not Always Perfect But Push On

The series of screw-ups and mistakes that we can make also give us the opportunity to be amazing if we allow ourselves that opportunity. Things will not always be perfect and I am continuing to allow myself to be at peace with it. I have not perfected, but in many situations some people will not even try because of that. Never can we allow ourselves to be held paralyzed by our own fear that it might not be as good as we want it. We just have to the best we can in every moment. Own your mistakes and then go ahead and do better next time. Your skills will keep on improving as long as you allow yourself not be holding back. Now is the time to let yourself and if you stumble get back up and keep going. It is a long journey and there is always ample time to recover.

I am thinking about a generation that has been more defined by drugs, video games, internet, sex then anything else thus far. I desire and I know many of you feel the same to be a generation that is remembered for helping to change this country. At this moment on the surface it seems unlikely, but underneath the surface there is something transpiring that changes all of that. It is a radical inner transformation. Truth hits and cuts thru and it doesn't have to be eloquent merely truthful and delivered in a way that keeps everyone's head ringing. Let it be something that they can't shake. Let it be a new beginning that starts right now.

let us get a little crazy in fact let it be alot crazy. Let us move forward and balance that with being deeply still so that we find that center where we are at peace with all living sentient beings ( I got that word sentient recently). Free at last but there is not at last we were always free we seem to have a glitch in our inability to perceive this immediate freedom that has always been available.

Close down only to open up more because closing off just hurts too much and the only other option is just to let it all go and not get upset by anything anyone else says.

Wednesday, October 24, 2007

Let It come on out

All over the place at times like my thoughts we sometimes run wild like Hemingway being chased by bulls. May I find the blue bull and may he help me to find the purple haze of a jimi hendrix that has come back to guard the tower. Give me hip-hop and call it jazz or give me country and call it rock. Let Johnny Cash be Jesus and let no one know the difference. Words can't fully tell you the story. Let lindsay Lohan Brittany spears and Pairs Hilton all become one entity simply known as a symbol like the artist formerly known as prince. We all have our own dramas let us bring the focus into this current moment and change the things that we are not content with and let go of the things that we can't do anything about. Such a simple concept that anyone could grasp this, yet we struggle to take this fully in and struggle to swim to the point of drowning when the water is only 3 feet deep. Still waters run deep and yet our fears seem to run deeper. Recently I asked my mom her views on death and she said "It is something to ignore". She views it as a bad thing and I realized this is merely the perception of a culture that I was raised in.

I want to love everything but find myself scared to always embrace things for what they are and project upon them. I want to laugh and cry and dance and rap like there is nothing else to do, but have this experience. We are all part of this amazing experience but it can only be that way if we open ourselves to it. Anytime I feel myself making a choice out of fear I do my best to stop and make another choice. The leap of faith is challenging but even more challenging is when we are in mid-air and we have yet to make it to other side and we have left behind everything that was familiar. I have spend much of the last 6 years letting go of attachments and still I have many more to release so that I can get to my core essence which is a deep peace. Of course when our mind is racing and we feel intensely anxious this seems like some sort of delusion and if we stay in our head we will continue to doubt that we can touch upon such amazing bliss so easily. May I continue to make my life more simple so that I can help other people to do the same.

Monday, October 22, 2007

I'm going going Going Back to Portland Portland

After seeing John of God I booked a plane ticket to Portland on November 1st. Not sure where I am staying just yet, but if you live in Portland and have room on your couch hit me up. In other news I really do love New York and I am fully enjoying the time that I have left here before I take off. I have been thinking alot about babies as of late I keep seeing them and some of my friends keep having them. Currently I have a warrant out for my arrest. I missed my trial for sitting on a park bench too late at night. Hopefully I settle all of this smoothly tomorrow. I have secured a lawyer who I had healed outside of a bar a few weeks back. I recently landed a full time campaign manager thru my buddy Dan Los. The campaign continues to get more press, and if you can get us anymore it would be splendidly appreciated.

Each day I am granted a look into my past, present and future and there is someone to tell me in case I forgot about places I've been during time period of my life and they learn something about me and I learn something about them that neither of us had previously known. Recently I keep having flash backs of my time in India. They keep coming thru in a very strong way. I learned in England that is very easy to start your own country. I wonder how easy it is to do in the United Stetes.

Wednesday, October 17, 2007

North Carolina/Echo Project/Healing/politics

I am currently in Wilmington, North Carolina after having spent sometime in Asheville, North Carolina and I will make sure at some point to take my shirt off and spin it round like a helicopter (long live rapper Petey Pablo). I was at a music fesitval that was a minitaure version of Bonnaroo and I had a truly wonderful time and ran into many people who I had met along the way and listened to quite a great music lineup but one of my favorite surprise performances was a group called Louis XIV who is quite catchy exciting and lyrically amusing to say the least. In Asheville North Carolina within my first 5 minutes walking around someone yelled at "I saw you in Brooklyn!". Long live the BK all day I also ran into some musicians who I had briefly met iin Union Square Park as more amazing dots were connected. Then on our final day we met two young backpacker adventurers named Clay and Mike. I had met Mike very briefly in Union Square and it was great to actually spend some time with him and his buddy Clay. Mike is also a member of couchsurfing.com and encouraged me to go to Hawaii which will be one of the main places I am thinking of focusing the presidential campaign. I know Hawaii is not quite the swing state that Florida happens to be, but if I can convince the producers I think it will work out well. Besides it is a dam big island with many of the worlds climate zones all contained there. I also Need to get back to my roots back to my sand heritage back to the wandering days. I tryed to settle down recently as some of you may or may not and it was to no avail. Literally a tornadoe and then a flood came which did not quite wash everything away but lead to sewage seeping up into the apartment. SO back to couchsurfing and the road of life where I always the passengers until I can meet someone with same contact prescription that I happen to have minus 4 in case you wondering, but I am very content walking around with "impaired" vision.

I have been thinking alot about not accepting the things I don't want because they I will not be able to make room for the things that I truly desire. My musician friend from Phllly (who also grew up in Jersey) actually was found by Mike and Clay and we gave them a ride to Wilmington which is where I am as I am typing this. I have court tommorrow for sitting in union square park too late at night I pleaded not guilty to this as I sang Jay Z lyrics about "not guilty you all got to feel me...". Even if they convict me on this ticket I my try to appeal this travesty of justice. I got the ticket because they are keeping me safe by keeping me out of the bench area of union square park at night. Obviously they don't know my love for Union Square Park. All of us are part of the same amazing journey to discovering that life is truly mysterious and I am embracing the mystery of life and not trying to pretend that I know anything about merely give tips that have helped me on the journey.

Crazy amounts of stillness and motion because a balance is needed between the both. Balance is needed between all things and sweating the small stuff just turns into big stuff and stuff merely holds you back from realizing what we are capable of doing on this planet. We are the infiinite cabinet and this is our country and it is about time we had the final say. Say HEY HEY HEY. DOn't you forget about me meaning the 200 million plus people who did not vote. That is who I am courting for votes so don't worry about me stealing away votes on election day. I am only going after the silent majority.

President Te'DeVan

Monday, October 08, 2007

Te'DeVan Smiley and the Infinite Cabinet for 2008

The election is already shaping up to be a total sham. We need to step it up another gear. I just got a video camera sent to me which will be used for very experimental presidential videos. Don't worry if no one takes them serious. When nobody takes you serious nobody will ever ended up taking you less serious. All of you people who read this you are the hope that certain issues will be brought to the forefront. The war drugs is the being hustle since I told my parents that I cleaned my room. Also we have stop putting millions of people in jail who do not pose a threat to other people's well being. We need to allow ourselves not to repeat the mantra that education is important and piss it away on war on drugs and war in Iraq. We always have more money to kill people that I don't know but not to educate our own children.

But we have to realize that Americans will only care about serious issues if you make them entertaining. They already have enough worries. We need to turn this into the best dam reality show in the world. This being said I am looking for a producer with organization skills who is ready to get on a veggie oil bus and shake things up. There needs to be a whole lot shaking going on.

In current news I am in NYC and will be heading towards Atlanta on Wednesday for another large music festival. Music makes the people come together. We need to come together right now. The writing is on the wall. We're not going to take it no we're not going to take it. We're not going to take it anymore. To the American people I love you and I believe that organic apple pie is wonderful. Dance, sing, strike a pose, and let's get crazy. But this campaign is never going to survive unless we are a little crazy.

Saturday, October 06, 2007

I Had Invisible Surgery From John of God

I am sure some of you have no idea what this means. I am not going to pretend to tell you that I know what this means either accept that for 40 days I am not supposed to have spicy food, no drinking, or any sort of sexual arousal. Also for one week I must be in bed by 12 to 5 with my eyes closed so that the entities can do work on me while I sleep. I ended up with a ticket to see John of God in upstate NY last minute because a friend of mine named Peter had one of his friend cancel. Oddly enough just before I got the news a friend of mine named Suz texted me that something good was coming my way soon. Soon turned out to be 3 hours later as I got a phone call from Peter to meet at 5:15 A.M. the next day at his apartment.Once there Peter discovered he was already wearing the bracelet that they were handing out (a yellow livestrong braclet, even though each day was a different braclet, but Peter had the right one for this day) I ended up running into a woman who I had met at Burning man, I guy I had met at Sai Ma, and a man who I had met in Brazil, along with a guy who I had done a healing on in Union square park (who came up to me as soon as I got out of the car) and a few other small world connections. It is things like this that really tell you that you are on your path.

When I got up to John of God he ended up taking my hand. This never happened to me the 5 weeks that I had been in Brazil. He took my hand quite gently and told me something in his native tongue which was translated as deep spiritual cleansing. This was something that I had already been told that I need by a psychic in Brooklyn. A large part of this was due to the large amount of healing work that I had been doing this summer. Though physically I felt really well. After this I was told that I was having invisible surgery at 2Pm later in the day and they put me in one of the rooms and I as I sat I felt rather relieved and emotional. I then slept for a while grabbed lunch and then sat briefly later on and then slept some more. The experience was amazing and I felt very open and emotional upon my return to the city. I slept for quite sometime that night and have been continuing to feel a strong presence around me since I left. I am extremely blessed to have been lead back to John of God. After I got back I went on line and booked a plane ticket to Portland for November 1st for $119.80. 119 has been a significant number sequence to me for quite sometime and it was also my flight number to India and to me the 8 represents the way I shake hands and how everything goes back to where it started. My 40 days will end right around November 14th which is when I had arrived back from Brazil in 2005.

It is early in the morning as I type this from one of my best friends apartment in Brooklyn not able to sleep, but feeling very good to be awake. Life is truly amazing and things will seemingly come out of nowhere such as this John of God experience, but we by being open allow these amazing things to come into our lives. I allowed this to come into my life and for that I am eternally grateful.I am also eternally grateful for all the wonderful people that I have allowed to come into my life over the years by remembering to slow down and that life is not a race rather an experience to be had.

Monday, October 01, 2007

I could Pop Up Anywhere

In my life I truly could end up anywhere at any moment. I do enjoy the spontaneous aspect of my life greatly, but it makes making plans in advance dam near impossible. I went briefly to upstate NYC to experience the energy of the healer from Brazil known as John of God. It was the Omega institute I was not a registered guest and was asked to leave, but not before I expereinced a deep state of stillness and a feeling that I had come to have my healing and greater awakening. Leading up to it I had quite a few emotional buttons that were pressed. I have been following the flow and allowing myself to feel that all things come to pass. I have been to so many places in this amazing a country and I want to find an amazing place and bring together many like minded people. Many places float thru my head as possible places. I believe that we are all perfect and we just need to stop and see our perfection and not focus so much on our flaws. I have given love and received and confused lust for love and unhealthy for healthy and the other way around. I am trying to find a deeper center. Trying to not try so hard, but not to allow myself to fall into certain patterns that don't offer me a chance to grow. We are all on our own epic jounreys which just have to be willing to take the first step. And we will know when it is time to take that step. In the meantime we merely need to enjoy where we are in this moment and not think that another place or situation is going to fix our problems.

I have also learned that people betray you, but don't view their actions as betrayal and all you can do is let it go or let bog you down. You just have to keep moving forward otherwise you are living in the past. I want to live in the present and experience the bliss that is always available. Recently I have been feeling a desire to express myself, but not sure what to say. Tai-chi, chi-gong, yoga, etc.. these are just some ways toward a quiet mind and open heart. I want to be brave though my mind sometimes trys to get in the way. I can not heal anybody I can only hold the space for people to let go of their pain when they are ready. We can be vessels for healings all of us can be its just some of us allow ourselves to be that vessel. There are many different ways to heal and the most powerful one is to be present.
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