Monday, June 11, 2007

Straight to the POINT OF Things

Humor is time removed from Pain. For instance when I spent a good two days feeling very sick in India it felt awful, but in retrospect I find it to be quite hiliarious. I recently have become obcessed with the idea of cute southern girls that use the word Preggers. They are real simple and just want to be married and preggers. I think that preggers is my word of the month. I am not special please do not think me special. I am the same as you and everyone that you know. There is no difference between me and your local bank teller, stripper, police officer, Iraqi citizen, etc.... I am finding people and things that I knew existed but seem to elude my grasp. I am slippery like quickie Koala. I am going to Tennesse and I am feeling that I don't want to talk about change or healing as much rather I prefer to experience these things. People seem to want to talk about this stuff, but are not willing to do expereince it. Get out of your own way and let God fly that plane or drive that car. There will always be someone more out there then you.

We have thoughts that pull us on numerous directions and we are the ones who are capable of seeing things as they are once we can remove our biases that have been programmed into us. I want to find Judy Garland somewhere over the rainbow and tell her I have a yellow brick road with her name on it. Get off the heroin and the cocaine it will only break everyones heart and make you more insane. Been around quite a few druggies lately and there anguish is devastating. We need to wake up out of out bubbles. Manic mysterious and completely delirious and just don't take yourself way too serious.

There will be death and there will be life and nothing really separates one from the other. There will be dancing and stillness hunger and fullness and all of it is some sort of experience that we have at some point or another. I don't care for politics I care for people. The problem is that politics doesn't care for people merely it cares to preserve itself. We all have to look at the next person we see and let us see the person that we most love and admire in their face.

The War stops when the internal conflict stops. Something is happening here and what it is clear is that there will be a whole lot of shaking going on. The rubber band will snap and the bubble will burst and there will be many people with great thurst and many people being driven off in a hearse such is the curse when there is imbalance. There is no reason to be sad because the sun will always come out tommorrow. Tommorrow tommorrow I love you tommorrow your only a few weeks or maybe months away.


sonny said...

email me at

Yo Te'devan and dr. john bender!

I am in Sri Nagar, Kashmir, India!

I have a 10year visa.

I hope you don't mind if I flood your blog just once. I will paste an email I just sent to my family in India since I don't have time or money to write again.

Please give me your email Te'devan and God Bless you with your campaign I pray that you do become President and I when I return from India in a few years I will shake hands with the President! God BLess!


I am here in India. I don't have much money or time so I will copy you the email I sent you to Andrew and Sarah just now-you will learn everything of my time thus far. O yeah I spent a night wandering New York City including Time Square and Brooklyn before I went to Amsterdam and finally India.


I am in Sri Nagar, Kashmir. Sorry it has taken a while to contact you. First the Internet connections were very bad, and than I was having trouble with the phones. Now I know how to call you but it is so much cheaper to email. I spent 48 rupees for a maybe 5-7 minute phone call to Mama, and now at this nice cyber cafe I can surf for 60 rupees for 1 hour.

Anyway I came to India to go to Rishikesh to begin Sadhu life in pilgrimage to Rishikesh/Haridwar to Meditate at Ganges for the summer. Here we say InShalla which means when God pleasures-like when Grandfather used to say "May God's Will be done above all Else."

So now I am living with a very Godly poor Islamic pure Indian Family in a Lake house. Everyone has embraced me as Family and it is a big family living real Indian life. I Love It!
I am learning about Islam and learning to live its culture. God wants me to learn Islam-I already know everything about Hinduism in theory and practice so it is a change and challenge worth the effort. I am enjoying the nice homecooked meals, kashmir tea, chai, special kashmir salt chai, and an occasional smoke off a hooka of tabacoo and maybe a little bit of Hashish here and there. One of the first things I did was climb a small local mountain to visit a 2500 year old Shiva Shankara Temple that is a pilgrimage spot and still functions as a Temple with a big Shiva Lingam that glows in the early morning Sunrise. I saw all of Sri Nagar from up there. It is ancient!

Actually this last week I was trekking in the Mountains with my new Brother Raja or as he is known by those who love him Raj. We were trekking high in the Himalayas for 5 days with 2 other villagers and a nice Yogi tourist from France who is a little older than me, his name is Thomas but we love to call him Mister Thomas. We trekked high into the mountains even to the point of crossing snow and drinking fresh Glacier Water! We were in ancient land where shepards dwell with sheep, goat, cattle, chickens, buffallo, and horses roaming about everywhere. Everyone believes in the God of our Father Abraham and I was feeling like I was with Israelites in Bible times, it is very heart warming especially when hearing the soaring prayers in the Sufi Mystic Style.

Now I am back just today in Sri Nagar and am Happy to be back with family, but also missing all of your association. I am going to be staying here for a while although my heart still cries for Rishikesh and the Ganges-I have a lot to learn. Maybe after summer I will go to Rishikesh and also come see you in Lucknow, and visit Vrindavan and Varanasi too, but I don't want to leave here yet because when I leave here I am going to begin Sadhu Life practicing austereity and ascetism.

It is so hot in the summer, and my dream is that you guys would come stay up here for a week in a house boat. You can rent a nice room with a bathroom and eat nice family meals and chai. It would be great to see you and honestly you would love it up here. There is so much spiritual life manifested as love up here.

Starting tomorrow I am beginning a Fast from everything but water. I am also going to start reading the Koran and it will be my bread. When I finish the Koran I will stop my fast. I think it will take about a week seeing from the size of it. I really need a fast anyway and I thought it would be a nice way to make it a spiritual fast.

Yesu is my eternal Lord and Master, but I also love to cultivate knowledge and learn different mystic meditations. The pieces of the puzzel come togather with knowledge and meditation, but most importantly Love.

Soon I am going to visit Raj's Baba. Raj is 29 and is like an older brother. His Baba is a Sufi who is a householder family man working for the Government. Baba is only 36, but apparently he is very advanced. Maybe I shall ask him to initiate me into a Sufi mantra so I can soar into the light of God. Also once a month he has live Sufi Music at his house-kindof like kirtan I think. I heard some recording of the last one from Raj-it sounds very nice.

Anway I would love it if you guys could come up here. If you have the time and budget let me know. You could take a domestic flight into Sri Nagar airport and be picked up and stay for however long you want. I was picked up by the Papa up the house Noor Muhammad and immediately I connected with his son Nayoob who is 34 with a family. Nayoob is my older brother and friend, but mostly he is my caring teacher. He is showing me how to live real life and guiding me in my studies and practice of Islam in meditation and manners. I also am now wearing handmade Kashmiri islamic clothing that was made by another person of the family a doctar actually named Bashir. It is very comfortable and beautiful. Nayoob gave me a new name too. I am now known as Yusup-(yoo-soop). I don't know how it is spelled but I guess Yusup was a Prophet from Iraq from the last couple hundred years. People also call me Yusuf(yoo-soof) which is the hebrew form of Joseph like in the old testament. I think people just hear and say one or the other. I was named Yusup but I do like Yusuf better because inside I am an Israelite.

I am glad to be In India and will see you Inshalla or when God pleasures. Please let me know if you want to come and if so when, than I will make arrangements and tell you everything you need to know. Ask any questions.

I will check the internet in the next few days.

Look forward to hearing from all of you.



sonny said...

my family in India is my cousin and her huband and there 2 year old daughter just to let you know.

Dr John Bender said...

Take care while overseas, Sonny.

~Dr J

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