Plane Insecurity

Recently I tried to get on an airplane with one of my notorious "6 foot 7 inch jew will freestyle rap for you" signs. They told me that I could not bring it on because they worried that I would use it to "bludgeon" people. Luckily I was smart enough to tell them it was also possible that my feet/hands could also bludgeon people and in a much easier way.
Two friends of mine recently had raw organic chocolate confiscated from them because they considered it to be a gel substance. Since when is chocolate a liquid or a gel? It is neither. Apparently any solid substance can now be deemed a liquid or a gel because the TSA official clearly told them, "I deem this a gel". My friends demonstrated the solidity of the chocolate and were threatened to be escorted out of the airport. I was really upset about this one. It is chocolate for Christ's sake. The airport people have been fucking up for years and now there trying to make up for it by becoming paranoid. So just so you know freestyle rapping jew signs and chocolate are no longer allowed on airplanes.

What is the world coming to is not a question I will ask. What I will say is that I will start an airline and you will be able to bring your raw organic chocolate on board as well as any funny signs that you made that can fit in the overhead bins or underneath your seat. Are these people anti-semites that desire to eat your chocolate or are they just paranoid Americans?
Either way you should all feel safer knowing now that neither of these two things are allowed on a plane. Over and out.
Te'DeVan

Late Night Stream Of Conscious

I realized a couple of days ago that parents worked really hard most of their adult lives to give me something I never wanted. No matter how many times I told them I did not want they strived to give it to me that much more and made me work hard to obtain something that I did not want. Made me wonder how many people spend their lives trying to get something that nobody truly wants, but they all pretend like it is the Holy Grail. It makes me think of all the people that wait outside of a club so that they can go inside and be lucky enough to spend $300 on a bottle of Vodka. On the surface people are superficial and underneath they are amazing, but many are scared to go in the deep end without their floaties.

If we all switched lives every now and then we would all be a little more compassionate. Try to walk in another person's shoes just once a year and see how much of a better person you become. I am in Miami and I am thinking about L.A., New York and Santa Cruz or maybe somewhere in the South on a road trip. Most people could benefit from a little more fun in their lives. Strip malls and strip clubs there is some sort of correlation think about it. The presidential campaign is off to a great start and the funding is rolling in as I type.

War On Poverty

So you thought India is backwards because they have a caste system and the untouchables well it seems in additon to Yoga we are now importing a law mandated caste system. It is actually against the law to have compassion and feed homeless people in Orlando and Las Vegas along with some other places. What the fuck is going on here people. But it is laws like this that even make a conservative cringe a little bit. It is along the lines of the Dred Scott Decision back in the day. America basically said "We racist, but we don't want to be that racist". When those who are in control start to realize they are losing control they get desperate. Obviously this is one of those times. In some places they have even tryed to set up panhandling zones. We should make showing emotion in public illegal as well because it makes alot of people uncomfortable. London bridges falling down falling down. SO what's next. I'm afraid of Americans I understand this sentiment more and more.

Not Good Enough... But Why?

Today I was I sitting outside of Wild Oats eating cholocate obcession soy ice cream that no matter what I did or had done it would never be good enough to me. Now, of course always striving to do better is a wonderful trait, but the feeling that it is not good enough is a common occurrence for most people. No matter what you do you will never be smart enough, cool enough, rich enough, desired enough, respected enough, famous enough, successful enough, etc...... Luckily this is not a feeling that consumes me, but is certainly a feeling that I have and something that I need to recognize otherwise it could lead to some very umpleasant mental states.

Regardless of how many healings I may do and how many people I may positively effect there is a part of me that feels that it is not enough and I comparing myself to saints, gurus, avatars, and John of God type healers. It is great to strive to accomplish more but it is also important to respect where we are at in our journey and understand that all these things will come in due time and that patience and persistence is a necessary requirement. Yet these accomplishments within themselves will not make us peaceful. I could heal a thousand people of cancer and I would still be thinking it is not enough it needs to be more. It always needs to be more and I am always going to be falling short. My acting,dancing,singing, and art are good, but still they are not good enough. In order to stop this pattern we have to shut off the noise in our mind and just pause and be completely enthralled in the moment we are in. It is really funny when you think about it. It could get to a point where you are having sex and saying "yeah this is good, but I could still be better in performance". The mind can be the bottomless pit that never can be filled no matter how much you fill it and the more you fill it the more it craves to be feed. So it is necessary to recognize the pattern and then to break it. Breaking this pattern takes place by getting out of your head.

So I recommend that everyone get out of their head (I will do the same) and feel the perfection of this moment and realize that it is more then enough.

New York I Cry Out To You

I wake up thinking about you quite often because almost everyone I have ended up was thru a situation that first started with you. It always started with you and you send me off on the craziest adventures always to bring me back to you. Yet everytime I come back you are always different and I am always different as well. You always give me a whole new cast characters each time I come back to you. I am in Miami right now, but I am completely in that euphoric New York State of MInd. You never cease to amaze me and you always have more in store and not one second in your embrace is a bore. I have been coming in and out for 5 years now and still it never gets old and everywhere I go I see those who I first met thru you. When they see me they are in shock for the wonder how I can wander from you as if you and are I somehow one.

Your streets I have walked more in the 5 years of exploring then others have in 50 years or more. I walk and walk and walk and yet I hardly grow tired because you have constant surprises for me on each corner at each turner. People from my past and new characters for the future. There is never a shortage of people in your midst to keep utterly fascinated. They come from everywhere and I some sort of caretaker on your behalf. I help them to make their way inside of you and to help them keep their heads when others are losing theirs.

You have watched me grow 60 years in just 5 years. Each passing month being filled with a year of experience or more. I thank you for all that you have given me and continue to give me even though I am thousands of miles away, but to me it is only a hop skip and a jump and you would never bring me back before the stage is set for the next scene. For what is the point of having an actor on set if their is no action yet to take place.

You are deeply in my thoughts and prayers and I will never get over you nor you over me. We are lovers from birth from birth in your womb I arrived and in your womb I shall rest when the time comes. But you know of my wanderlust in fact you greatly encourage and aid in my wanderings because I always bring new energies back to you and your other children.

Somewhere over the Rainbow way up high I know theres a land that I heard of once in a lullabye. Truer words have hardly been spoken.

On That Verge

So I have a couple of ideas floating around in my head these days and just waiting to see which one avails itself to me. There are so many possibilities in this world and sometimes it seems a bit overwhelming, but if we can relax the most beneficia onel will make itself known to us when the time is right. A great idea and a bad idea can be separated by just one day. Yet, I feel as if I am going to make a large discovery inside of myself that will effect the way I go about my everyday living.

We are all making our own time capasules containing things from the past yet many of us seem to swallow it instead of burying it in the backyard. Perhaps by consuming we are trying to digest it, but the system was made to excrete such things. Yet time capasules are very challenging for the body to spit out. We all have dreams and when we reach a point where they might actually manifest we become excited and scared. Ultimatley none of our accomplishments will bring us the greater peace tha all of us consciously and unconsciously seek.

I write to you from Miami Beach but I just could as easily being writing this from New York, L.A., India or anywhere in the United States for that matter. We all have an amazing destiny for ourselves if we allow ourselves to follow our intution and not resist because it is unfamiliar to everything that we think that we have come to understand. We must Grok things instead of looking at things in cursory manner indicative of a generation diagnosed with "permanent" attention deficit disorder. We are all collectively flying to higher levels of peace and prosperity and new ideas will manifest at the forefront of our mind. We are all on that verge and that verge neccesitates change which will take place regardless of how hard we try to hold onto old concepts.

A New Nightlife

In a world of plastic women the plastic card is king and gold is nice, platinum is better, but the Black American Express in Trump in this game. All the peacocks show their brightest feathers. Somehow anything that is real or sincere is taken out of the equation and the most superficial and plastic person is on top of the pyramid of insecurity. This can be signified by $300 Vodkas that bars convince wealthy patrons or (desperately wanting to appear wealthy) to spend so that other people in the bar can know how succcessful they must be. Nothing tells us more of someone's character when you see them spend $300 or more on a bottle of Vodka that is worth about $30.

People will also wait online outside to go inside and spend this absurd amount of money. People must think that Utopia exists inside of these bars (as someone who has been inside I can tell you it is far from Utopia). If they go into that door somehow they will become a better person (drunker/higher/poorer person. It is alot more likely by getting a hug from Amma that you will become a better person, but she does not have any late night club yet(focus on yet). People are trying to connect with each other, but they don't know how to do this because they don't have a realtionship with themself that does beyond their appearance or status. I don't fault anyone for this, but I do recognize the insanity of this social world that has been created. We need to create a new social world.

What if there were a late bar that served organic juices, teas, (we can also make some $300 brews for those who don't want to feel out of place) give out free hugs at the door (of course tip your hugger), Healers, Psychics, and really interesting nomads that you can take home with you. We could call it "Bring Back The Nomad". These Nomads would be happy people that have found peace within them that radiates outward or just complete maniacs that have something that makes it hard not to keep staring at them.Yes, this is it a new nightlife has been formed. You have read it here first NOW! the prophecy shall unfold.

Organic Juics, Overpriced Teas, etc.. and a whole new world that is a break from the mundane. By the way, one last thing lots and lots of 80's music. Remember fellows all she wants to do is dance. She likes to party she likes to get down because all she wants to do is dance.

Sincerity is something that even when completely out of place that people always notice.

Going A Little Mad, Okay Alot Mad

There are moments where I honestly feel like the Buddha (in a state of total zen, so blissed out of my mind) that almost everyone is postive that I am rolling and wanting to know what I am on or thinking that I might be Jesus returned. There are other days of course where I feel just a bit mad. I don't feel so much angry as I do that I am about to explode with some sort of epiphany that will cahnge everything in the way that I percieve. The traveling that I do is about opening myself up to different points of view especially if others view them as outlandish.

I brandish an invisible sword every now and then and feel the desire to vanquish the invisible foes that exist in my mind. To hit the off button and succumb to the peace that represents our truest and highest nature. Yet, sometimes before we reach that point, and we are still holding onto the old ways we start to go a little mad. Perhaps a little batty. We might start laughing uncontrollabley at odd moments or having conversations outloud with no concern to how others might percieve this behavior. Being miserable and not trying to let go of that misery is the truest madism I can think of (yes I think I made the word madism up). Being apathetic and feeling that passion is some sort of fleeting novelty. Passion is the way that life was meant to be lived. I choose my madness and my sadness, but I also choose to reliquish them so that I can experience a serenity that soothes my being. We all want to feel this way; but many people are convinced that only valium or some other substance is the way to achieve this feeling. I would based off my own experience and the experience of others disagree with this idea.

We can stop the madness at any moment and surrender to the power of the moment that we are in right now. Allow Love/God/Universe/Yoda to bless our whole being thru and thru. "Alright stop! children what's that sound everybody look what's going down". Going beyond traditional thought takes us to that next point where things come into being at the mere suggestion from the lips of our minds. We have the power to shape this world in ways that most have not considered. So I ask you to consider the power of your thoughts after having surrendered your will to the higher force. If just one of us can find peace it makes that much easier for the next person to find that same state of being.

Out of the Blue Comes A Call

This call comes and all things change or at least all things appear to change. Your heart flutters madly and you are estatic, but scared simultaneoulsy you had written this whole situation off as a farce and then it comes back. With the force of a boomerang and it threatens to chop of your head if you don't keep your composure, but maybe you need to have your head taken off. Maybe the razors edge is where you need to be. I remember you so well and I loved you so much, but when I give it away it always comes back. In fact it only comes back when I give it away.

Let the soul sway to a rhythym that offers to expose all your weakness and then you shall know truth that you have never known because it was never shown the light of day. It was always comfortablely numb and then there are those who cut so that they can taste the blood. You are their refuge and each time you step your ego meets its demise. Only the love was real and nothing can change that.

I will see you again when both of least it expect it rationally, but feel it with an intution that nothing will be the same and everything will be the same simulataneoulsy. Caught between your thighs and baptized by a dance that will break all the false ties that I no longer need.

Some Thoughts to Help You On Your Path

I always hear people saying that they don't have enough time do what they want. Usually because they are too busy doing things that they don't want to do. Do you realize how many jobs we create in this country just to keep people busy and contributing to the economy. Yet, there are much more enriching things that we could be doing with our time. Allow yourself to make two lists. On the first list you write what you spend most of your time doing and on the second list you write things that make you most happy. Ideally both lists should match up. Often when pressed we are quick to admit that life could come to an end in the blink of an eye, but despite this fact we keep living as if things will always be the same. We keep playing it safe even when playing it safe is killing our desire to be alive.

What the heck does playing it safe mean? It means that you want to do something or say something and you don't because you don't want to risk the possibility that some change could take place. I know that we all have our own bridges of fear to cross and it just demands that you put one foot in front of the other and allow your voice to be heard. We all need to be heard, but most people usually suffer in silence and are not heard. Are you being heard in your life or do you merely suffer in silence?

What do you want out of life?
What are steps that you are taking towards that desire?
Could you make greater efforts?
What things are holding you back that are in your control?
Have you been honest with yourself and your loved ones?

These are just a couple of questions to bounce around in your head. We all have an opportunity to live brillant lives full of many wonderful things, but we must take steps that enable us to live in that way. I have not mastered any of these things, but I continue to strive to become better and more honest with myself.

Revolution is the evolution of humanity,
Te'DeVan

Destination Unknown

So often people are always asking me when I am going to be showing up at such and such location. Even some of my dearest friends ask me this question. Truthfully I have almost no idea, but I find myself giving vague timelines as to when I might end up arriving. People's minds have this intense desire for everything to be very neat and orderly. There is very little about my life that qualifies as neat or orderly. I am a nomad that moves which ever way the winds may take me. I surrender myself to the magic and allow things to play out as they will. Of course on occasion even I desire to be able to say with some degree of certainity that I will be in a given place for an exact amount of time. But I simply do not know these things nor do I want to know. I simply want to be wherever I may be and bask in the wonder of the moment that I am in.

Sometimes I will arrive in a place and as soon as I get there people will ask me where I am going next. This obcession with what is next takes people out of the current moment. I have been guilty of this myself, but I realize that the future does not exist nor does it hold a solution to any problems. This very moment that exist in is the only moment of any real significance. All other moments are based on what follow from the moment of now. I command (in an uncommmanding sort of way) you to be wherever you are,to be with the people you are surrounded by, and to be with the stillness that exists within the silence of this moment.

Ripples on the pond do not change the pond from being a pond nor do raindrops on the ocean make the ocean anything more or anything less then an ocean.

I used To write

I nver want to utter that sentence. I always want to go at this keyboard with reckless abandon like Hemingway after another drunken night on the streets of Key West. I would rather be an emotional hack than eloquent corpse. I want to take chances in every respect in my life. I want to have occassional bad sentecne structures I want to mispel words. I want to dance the drunk words sober. I want the madness to become waves of acid color rainbows from some sort of astral plane. I want to make no sense at all and have women that I have never met fall in love with some sort of alternate identity that comes out late night to the dismay of man who is too often rational. Would does being rational ever get you. I must take chances in my work, writing, love life, dancing, swimming and everything in general. I must immediately go full force and become the renegade turtle who has been lulling people to sleep only to nail them with the crucfiction of the hare. Give me hair and lots of it all over the ass crack of the plumbers that come to late in a world of overflowing highschool toilets with cherry bombs that were purchased in person and not on the internet. May I meet bold, beautiful bisexual women that know I am a bit of a sexist and are not trying to change me. We must fight nothing there is no good fight. Fights are for suckers I just want the good blowjob on the beach.... I am Hunter S. Thompson I am Native American back for revenge. I will make Don quixotee to seem reasonable.

Let it all flush down the drain and may the clowns make me laugh cry and run to the nearest organic grocery store. May people realize that Utah has for major M's Marines, Mormons, Mountains, and Meth heads. I still believe in you and this country and I don't have to do anything but be. Let it Be my friends. John Lennon still lives and Bob Marley is now a tall freestyle rapping jew. I will do my best to make outrageous comments and keep you in a cage made of straw. Viva La Conch Viva La COnch. Read about Key Weird or Key West or whatever you think about calling it.