I've got some bags that I need to drop off

I feel like I have spent most of my life carrying around a whole bunch of bags that I don't need looking for distractions to escape the pain not feeling this moment a good enough high. Yes I can escape temptation but its pull is so strong and for me that pull comes in the form of women and I confuse lust for love. But really I am not confused. And I know that my lust is mixed with love and sometimes I can walk away from them when I realize it, but other times I just want to completely a fully indulge because the not knowing even gets to me from time to time. I want something that is tangible even if it is merely fleeting. Despite my greater knowings I am still delusional which leads to suffering.

The Bus Has Come

I am in Burlington, Vermont and I have become a member of a group known as the bunny society. We have a 45 foot long bus and will be traveling around to music festivals and college campuses all around this nation following the flow and documenting our adventures. We will be surviving off of money we raise and t-shirts and things of that nature that we will be selling to take care of expenses as we travel along. Our bus will soon be converted to vegetable oil and turned into a giant bunny on the exterior. We desire eventually to add more buses as funds and people are added to the group. We are looking for all sorts of people with different talents to be a part of this adventure. If you are interested check us out on facebook. The Bunny Society or the Bunny Bus. "Ask not what your bunny can do for you but what you can do for your bunny". I am pretty sure John F. Kennedy would have said that if he was still alive today.

I first connected with this group at Rothbury and officially started sleeping on the bus at the Gathering of the Vibes music festival in Bridgeport, CT. We are adding musicians, mystics, merry pranksters, maniacs, mechanics, media people to document this once and a lifetime journey. This is a journey we encourage everyone to create on their own and we will be traveling around helping other groups of people to setup their own buses. I want to thank everyone for being a part of my journey and hopefully you will also be part of the Bunnies journey as well.

It All mErges here and Now

Adjusting to the present moment instead of talking about the past or dreaming about the future. Be here now and adjusting to those feelings that are coming up and the feeelings have left and maybe they won't ever return, but your natural bliss can not be given or taken by anyone. Cut your hair grow your hair and find that passion that keeps pushing you to a place where feeelings is different then what you have come to understand. Things will change very quickly and we grip tightly to so many things that we have outgrown but now is a chance to make room for the present. Take me out to the ocean and then let me find the bay and make my way to another overseas adventure. Yet the greatest adventure happens with knowing this is the moment that everything happens and this is the moment to base your life upon. Scream be silent or have a silent scream. Darting in a thousand different directions and remember Pablo Escobar was a hoax our government makes tons of money off of drugs and we suffer as people as the money is too much of temptation. There maybe aliens there maybe spirits and there maybe a huge conspiracy yet none of that actually matters. What matters is that you make peace with this moment for everything that is and strive to be alignment with the present. I love you this invisible force that allows karma to be resolved.

We All Figure it Out in Our Own Time

I am now in Boston experiencing Amma for the 3rd time this year though in a sense since she is an Avatar she can be experienced anywhere at anytime in the same way that we can experience anything anywhere at anytime so to be more accurate this is the 3rd time this year that My physical body and her physical body have been at the same place at the same time, but Avatars have no karma and therefore don't experience time in the same way that we do because we are still working through our karma.

All of this may make perfect sense or sound completely crazy or rather a partial understanding of something that is infinite. Everytime I witness Amma I become more aware of how special she and every other person is if they allow their true essence to poke through their shell. People ask the same questions and I am usually giving different anwsers. A woman that I met here today told me I should be on the "Today Show" and I have heard at least one or other person mention such a prediction to me. All of us are coming together to create a country of peace. Yet we have to be individuals of peace first before we can be a nation of peace.

Rothbury was an amazing experience and I am certainly a big fan of the enchanted forest and the cleanliness of the event and the avaiablity of cheap organic produce. They raised the bar on what we should expect from a music festival. I craigslisted a ride from Chicago to NYC with 4 people known of whom knew each other. Two of them were going at it a bit and started channeling a sound that sounds very similar to those Tibetan bowls that have been enjoying increaseing popularity from what I can gauge. After doing this everyone in the car would become silent for sometime and then I would open up the window to allow the energy to disperse. No one made any comment about it, but it always internally understood. Sounds can say alot more then words and silence can say the most sometimes, but sometimes you just have to let it all out and any sort of harmonic sound has always been of great assitance to me.

I want to thank everyone out there who continues to explore inwardly to find your own truth and understanding and people who put in the effort to show compassion and patience especially when we might feel otherwise.

How Do you Write about silence

Often one of the most challenging missions in my life is talking about silence to people who would not resist the silence that they desire to explore. No amount of talking is going to enable me to relay this message. The words can point at it but there comes a point where the talking must cease and the being must take over. 20 seconds of silence and most people are convinced that I am either mute or will never talk again instead of accepting a 20 second period of silence. Om OM OM or as we know in the west Amen.

I remember When

I am in Chicago and I have been here a few times before and each time I here I find myself in different circumstances with a different cast of characters. I often wonder how I end up in the places that I find myself in connecting with people from my past who become part of my present and my easily forseeable future and all that it entails. I am often chasing my own tail in attempt to make it back to the place of no judgment and no pride to cause me to dishonor that which is sacred. I have often been bold to a point that I find myself being reactionary and creating more problems. More often I can catch myself from falling into the vibration. Each little thing that we do has some sort of impact we just can't always understand what it means nor should we try to place meaning on things. Everything has its place I am walking a fine line between having a mission and being completely absurd. I can't expect nor should anyone expect people to live as we live. We all have to find our own way our own inner liberation. I can't give anyone something that they already have. I can merely point it out to them if they are willing to pay attention and bring the mind to a deep silence. I am guided by heart and on occasion caught in the maze of a mind that can never be satisfied. My freedom happens when I surrender to what is and stop chasing what will never be yet knowing things can change if am willing to change. Being that Change in a perpetual state of transition and realizing that I am not any of the waves. Thank you for being a part of my journey no matter how brief.

When those Wave of Emotions Hit

Sometimes I will be sitting somewhere listening to music, watching a movie, hear certain news, getting ready to depart, sitting in the presence of a very spiritual being, reminded of a moment from the past. It will be a current a waterfall and just overtake me to a point that I almost experience a mini-panic attack. I am not even sure where they come from, but they are so strong and in the midst of them I feel as I might never stop feeling that emotional. On some level they truly scare me and make me want to contact thousands of my friends and ex-girlfriends and people that I have met in passing and somehow sit them all down at once and simply say that I love them and I am sorry for an unnecessary hurt that they I may have caused them in a world that displays too much cruelty. I wish people were not over sensitive and then I find myself being that same exact way. I am not truly sure what "over" sensitive means. In a world where most people have gone numb to feel your emotions at all will make a vast majority of people uncomfortable. When I have this experience I wonder for a brief moment if this feeling does not dissipate I will not be able to function in this world. Yet not functioning in a disfunctional world seems like an amazing blessing. Tonight the movie Juno was my trigger just in case you were wondering. I thought about what would happen to the child and about my non-existent child and the thought of that happening to me at an earlier point in my life and how that would have effected me...

I continue to explore the depths of my emotions and to embrace the passion that runs through my being and to bask in the bliss that is now when it comes over. To allow healing to flow thru my being. To be okay about making mistakes so that I am not paralyzed into not being able to make a choice. You can always pick the ball back up if you fumble it. I will attempt to make the highest choice that I can make for myself at any given moment. I will be seeing Amma the hugging Saint on Sunday in Dallas, Texas with a friend named Brian who I got to know very well on a truck ride back from Bonnaroo. At the same festival I ran into a girl who had given me a ride back to Connecticut last year. She had quit her job and was substance free and wanted some tips on being a nomad.

For anyone asking me tips on being a nomad or being domesticated I will simply tell you make the mind as silent as possible and listen to your heart it feels much differetn then your ego. Trust me on this much. Choose out of bravery courage not out of fear or of lack. Be patient and trust when you have no rational reason to merely your inner knowing. Often I rely on rides from complete strangers that I have never met from the internet and hope that they follow thru on what they told me. One time it did not work out, but that was merely a miscommunication and worked out better as a result. Let life tell you what it has in store for you as you learn to listen as we collectively remember how to listen once again.

That Road and A strangers Car/truck

I figure that I have hopped in well over 75 different strangers cars/trucks in the last 7 years of being a nomad. Each one offered me some sort of glimpse into myself and the world in general. Most were met on craigslist and a few of them I met on the spot just as I needed to get somewhere. In one extreme case in Chicago I hitchhiked a plane ride from the now defunct miggs airport. At each moment these people have played a role in my life and in many cases we had hardly spoke until I got in their car. Some of them have become good friends and others were people I connected with in passing. In one case I got a ride from San Diego to Austin as the man completely emotionally and mentally unraveled in front of me stilling reeling from his wife leaving him, a gambling problem, and a large amount of coffee, cigarettes, etc... Yet I was not upset or bothered by his emotional instability merely another experience to have on this long unfolding journey. They have taught you to fear strangers and yet some of these strangers have become some of my best friends all because I just went with my feeling and trusted that would show-up at the agreed upon time. Many of these people have given great stories of laughter and sadness. I act as an observer and witness to this American experience getting to Know myself and our country.

A Small Introduction of Sorts To Couchsurfing and My life

Being a Nomad people ask if I get lonely and from time to time I certainly I have that experience, but even if I stayed in one place and never left I would still have that acute feeling of lonliness. People ask me where I am from and merely tell them I am nomad or that I am from the same place as they are or just make a sound that explains better then any words could express. My life is about perfecting living in the present moment and accepting the things I can't change and changing the things that I can. Currently I find myself in Austin, Texas using an internet site called "www.couchsurfing.com" which strangers open up their couch/floor/extra room/backyard/ or whatever it maybe to travelers such as myself. I joined the site 4 yesrs ago at its infancy with merely a few thousand people spread around the world and now it is well over 600,000 members. People have profile which include references and the friends that they have from all walks of life.

It certainly is different then the old fashion way of going to the bar and staying late and seeing where you end up. People have a tendency to be more open after having a few drinks to having spiritual healers/freestyle rappers sleep on their couch. On one occasion in a college dorm I had the girls google me as a way of showing my references. Somehow being a psuedo-celebrity makes couchsurfing a little easier and occasion I receive e-mails from people that I have met only in passing or never met at all offering me a place to stay if I ever make to such and such place. Tonight I was thinking of all the places I have been and the people I have met.


Everyone hss a different view of me and none of it is usually accurate somewhere in between exists a truth and usually one that almost nobody can fully accept in the same way we can't seem to accept many things. There are always unseen forces in life, but some of us are more aware of them then others. I recommend getting over your fear of strangers and getting on craigslist and grabbing a rideshare. Meet up with them for coffee or tea and vibe things from there. Trust your gut feeling and continue to hone it and one day the only thing that you can count on is that feeling. I am on quest to awaken to the greatest peace that exists inside of my core the same peace that exists inside of your core. I've had many ambitions, but this is the only one that I have ever had that warrants my full attention.

Thinking in A Brand New Way

I find that I am not trying to do so much and because of that very simple fact I find that more things keep happening around me. So often we work so hard to work against the very thing that we are trying to accomplish. As we slow down we can better see the entire picture and therefore are able to make choices towards a happier that we are all entitled to live if we give ourselves permission to be happy. I am more interested in my own inner experience then I am interested in the idea of beliefs. I can feel changes taking place inside of me that are bring me closer to my higher self. Our country is conditioned to live in a state of fear that there will not be enough and that we all need to compete and fight and then we miss out on all of life's simple pleasures. The government is breaking down and is corroding as we the people need to take the reigns of our destiny. This goes beyond voting this is us not tolerating the abuse of power. We have to elect in entire new brand of politician that we as people find on our quest for peace. The old model can not sustain itself and the bubble has to burst as we have taught the rest of the world the sickness of rampant consumerism that will make this planet incapable of sustaining healthy life. We still have many of our most influential leaders denying global warming and pretending that we are making headway in Iraq only to lose our supposed success a month later.

We keep going about things in the same way expecting a new a wonderful result. Now is the time to create sustainable forms of living and cutting through the red tape with common sense instead of being enslaved by this red tape that is only removed for the benefit of wealthy corporations. We have a spiritual wealth of happiness that we are all entitled to experience.

I Am Now Back Blogging

The road was filled with so many turns and that desire to express what has been taken place and slipped away for a while, but not is veering its head out again. I am still running for president and will not be shutting down or giving a concession speech anytime soon. Hilary raised hundreds of millions and I have merely raised hundreds and I am still in this race, but for me it is more a stroll. Turtle express style I am now in Austin staying with someone named Cheney. Remember for every bad Cheney there has to be a good one. I am not focused on any particular projects merely the present moment. The focus of the campaign is about ending the war on drugs which is a war on our own people that according to Rolling Stone has cost us 500 billion with no net positive results. In fact we have spent that money only to hurt our own citizens. The only effective way to handle the drug problem is through treatment centers which are grossly underfunded because even Presidents such as Bill Clinton did not want to look weak on crime. Yet the strategy for the war on drugs has failed just like the war in Iraq is failing. We are using the same broken model over and over again. 2/3 of this country is not engaged in the political process and that will soon change.

Music festivals offer an opportunity to connect with many people around the country searching for new ways to shape the policy of our country. As a people we need some to reflect and a willingness to change otherwise many more of us will suffer needlessly. I am not saying anything you don't know merely hoping to prod a innate desire to go within your own being and touch a greater peace to share with a nation which seems to be in a spiritual drought. People are running in so many different directions anywhere as long as they don't have to be in the here and now. I thank anyone and everyone who has made some effort to let go of the suffering so that can help others do the same.

That Road Trip That Changes Lives "The TUrtle Express 2008"

So Here I am in New York City about to take off on another road trip with buddies of mine that I know from the Jersey Shore specifically LBI. It is almost like some sort of right of passage that people I know from the Jersey Shore Specifically LBI go on a cross country roadtrip. At first it was just Smiley my vice president and then Matt Fisher and now Georgi and Dan Los and some guy named Ben Post from craigslist. We are heading to a musical festival called "Sasquatch" named after a mythical creature that may or may not exist depending who you talk to he is also called "Big Foot" for the average joe on the street. Georgi has gotten back from Iraq after doing interogation work and is looking to open up to the world around him and write and take pictures along this journey. The first part of this trip will involve Chicago and people who I met in NYC/San Francisco who are from Chicago. I have e-mailed a girl from North Dakota named Cassie who will be able to put up at least two of the crew and the other two will figure out some couches as well. Ben and Cassie are twists of fate from this internet age in which we live in. Along the way we will be selling t-shirts that we paint with different messages that we number in the back that express thoughts, feelings and ideas that are close to our hearts and things that merely make us crack up.

My first home is the road it is one the place where I am least likely to fall into any sort of routine other then listening to my intution and breaking habit energy that would keep me stuck in the same place. I got back from New Orleans before here having gone to Jazz fest and I have had over 10 run-ins with people who I crossed paths with in Miami. I just got a text message from a buddy of mine named Kurt who I met in NYC who remembered me from dancing on the campus of American University about 4 years ago. It seems that people don't dance on campus that often. I am hoping to document alot of this trip and wake up to my greater inner potential and help others do the same. I want to get over my attachment to an identity/ego that can cripple me from being my higher self. The higher me that doesn't care what people think or even what I think, but is merely striving to feel myself fully in the ever present now. On this trip I will lay a good deal of my ego to rest so that I can hold a deeper space of silence. On this trip I will be fasting at various points. On this trip I will be falling in love with something unseen but always felt. Miles Davis Blue in Green and the great American landscape for a reluctant presidential candidate that feels that even though most people get the shaft it doesn't have to be that way anymore....

Our true hearts desire is to be happy with who we are and what we are doing right now.

Video from the past hope you laugh and enjoy

We Have Not Talked iN a While

So many things to say, but mostly I want you to know that I am back In NYC Still healing, freestyle rapping, and running for the white house. Mostly I am just focusing on being present in this moment and let my intution guide me down the yellow brick road. I will start blogging again. Our banks and credit systems are set up in a way that they can keep stealing from us. Large corporations have to stop robbing the vast majority of overtaxed Americans who are not benefiting from the taxes that they are paying. We spend more money towards corpoartion welfare then welfare for American citizens. We bail out big corporations but not single working mothers. Funny where our priorities exist in this country. War gets more money then school. Killing gets more financing then education. I know that we will be turning this situation around.
President Te'DeVan

Check this one out Just found it online pass it on

Most Of Our Looking for Someone to have the Anwsers

In the void there is something that goes beyond anything any rational mind could understand. At some point we all have to take our last breathe. I am practicing being still a little more frequently and keep my feet deeply planted in one spot at one time. Yet the natural evolution of life leads us to the lessons that we need to learn. All of us are awakening in our way through our own path. There are great deal of things that I don't understand yet I have some sense of the greater truth that is reflected in them. Myth in our society is such a powerful thing and whose to say what is real and what is a legend often the two become intertwined. I still find myself in Miami and realizing staying put in one place for an extended period of time has great benefits but so does traveling around and connecting different groups from all over. Not everything is going to be that easy and the stillness of mind allows for more awareness which is truly the greatest healer. With awareness comes and acceptance of things for how they are and understanding of what we are capable of changing. Often I have been nervous or anxious at some point in my journey, but just a few more deeper breathes and some patience all things begin to reveal themselves. May I be grateful for all that have been given and thankful for all the love that I have given and received. New Orleans is pulling me closer and from there back to NYC to take a bite out of the big apple, but may this bite be my deepest as I plant myself there even more firmly then before.

We've Got The Right To Be Angry and Now we can drop the anger and make a change

I am not waiting anymore because it is time to take the youth and those who know how our country is being stolen from us. This is not a diatribe or an indictment just that we need to hold our leaders accountable and not our pop stars. Put the Paparazzi on the congressman and senators and not their personal lives but their policies. Bono lead to me end America's Bloody Sunday that just can't seem to end. There are agendas that running our country that belong to massive American people,. These selfish agendas are ravaging our treasury. We pay for mercenaries to kill innocent people abroad. Black water is the polution that we put all over the world and act clueless when it shows back up on our doorstep in the form of terrorism. We need to hold our leaders accountable. We need to come together and march on the capital that this government represents the American people. Our taxes are being stolen from and misspent in the hundreds of billions. We would better off burning half the cash at Burning Man and taking the rest and spending on the downtrodden American people. We keep pushing our poor and struggling people out of their homes as their rents rise. Fish don't worry about paying rent and many Americans are fixated on this thing just because a few people claim that the land belongs to them. How do we make these large oversights to be understood by the masses of Americans. Maybe we just need to turn into a reality show. A reality show focusing on this massive corruption. The new Uncle Tom's Cabin might have to be a non-fictional reality show that people come together in a deeper understanding.

MY Kind Your Kind Give me Just A Slice Of America

We all just need to learn how to share again and just take this moment for all the amazingness that holds and allow that inner freak to sip into our clothes, Words, moves, and just general head bob. Now is the time to explore to get out there and see something that you have merely read about. Push yourself to go outwards and find a deeper and more profound love of China, Chile, Japan, Fiji, And of course Kansas and New Orleans. Give me music give me dancing give me crazy clapping and finger snapping. Tell Bill And Ted that Wild Stallions are the horses that we were all meant to be. A stream of pop culture references are oozing into my writing right now. There is no way to miss this moment, but denial is a motherfucker and it causes so many problems, Instant gratification ain't fast enough and let me jump in car but the duct tape won't be needed because I am not Emniem. I am not as angry as I used to be because the dragon is dead and everything works itself out and I can't deny that I will die and that I will cry and laugh and that the cure for all things exist within our being. We just need to dig deeper and not race for a cure but stop and meditate for cures. We have millions of people dying from Malaria, Aids, and lack of clean water in a continent that we most associate with Blood Diamonds and Sally strthers and people that somehow don't seem real on our television. Maybe they just need to make better youtube videos or come out with a hot fashion line. Values don't generally change that quickly and knowing the things that will better humanity and being apart of these actions is the part that we have to focus on right now. My voice grows stronger each day there is a revolution brewing and there is a timing for things to erupt and place for people to listen. Listen for the silence and feel your self release those blocks in your throat and say your truth.

Make SUre she Is A friend

So you've won the lottery what the hell are you going to do with the money. Money and fame people act very strange agendas start to emerge. I don't care one way or another I am just listening to SHy from the early 90's "IF I ever Fall in Love Again". I am seeing the people that I have met in different places going through different phases. Be careful who you sleep with you or you can quickly find yourself caught in drama that you never needed that keeps you from the bliss that you have always wanted. Don't compromise and forget fundamentalism anything with the exception of attention to the breathing, but even that can be overcome. Can I make myself appear two places at once. I shaved my head and said goodbye to the past and fashion seems to surround me everywhere, but more importantly is my greater awareness of God in everything that I connect to that God has some part in taking us to a new level of understanding that we have to let if all go so why struggle too hard to get it because it was never yours to begin with. You were merely borrowing it and your just trying to find your breathe and let go of the jadedness and trust in something that your rational mind wished was more tangible. Keep your wits about you when everyone else is losing theirs and help those who want your assistance. Cast demons or negative entities in any name that you want to use but if the mind is not calm and clear then nothing is really changed. Some people are constantly in a state of conflict with themselves and the world around them.

Moses find a draft pick to speak his mind and risk all the endorsement deals because the people don't listen or trust the politicians. The athletes, movie stars, and singers are looked upon as some sort of prophets and they are usually just selling us stuff that nobody needs but somehow we can't remembered how we functioned without ipod, cell phone, and e-mail. Bring back the pony express or maybe the "Turtle Express". Don't try to make too much sense of things that you have limited understanding of a world where we only understand a small amount of factors acting on us and the others around us. I can feel that hand of God altering the landscape and keeping ready until the time is right and I am just waiting to hop off the cosmic couch and send my blessings to bedbugs in Brooklyn.

Break the Pattern Am I Resigned to My Fate

I once heard that we can do anything in this world its just that we can't control the outcome. Often I wonder how much of my life has been fated and how much of it can be changed or is is crazy to think that anything in this world is predestined in anyway. Maybe it is that certain events have a very high likelihood unless we take drastic steps. Maybe the only thing we can control is how we choose to respond to a situation. Fully realized beings are no longer in any way shape or form slaves to the past. In different moments certain people move to the forefront and background of your life. How will you deal with their eventual departure or passing. I want so many things and yet I want almost nothing at all merely a small desire to no longer be enslaved by my wants. To allow these things to fall away and to stop running away from this moment. Music inspires me to write and sometimes I listen to in audible way and other times I can merely hear the raindrops in my head. I have many quotes for many ocassions. I am soundbyte wizard who might actually spell soundbyte wrong. I want to revolutionize the concept of what qualifies as religion. Religion is the backdoor to avoiding much of life's nonsense. In a court room they make you take off your hat unless you wear it for religious reasons, but why are you obligated to tell them that before they threaten you with contempt of court. Perhaps you religion states that you don't have to explain yourself. Taking off your hat is merely an issue of manners and social customs. Yet where do our manners exist when we kill innocent citizens and call it a mistake or collateral damage. War does not make mistakes the very act insures that innocent people will die in the thousands or millions. Everyone has a vision of how their savior should be. Now is the time for us to find the peace maker inside of ourselves. "Peaceful is the new famous" is my new quote.