Tuesday, June 30, 2009

I'm in A Rothbury State of Mind

(Re-publication 11-14-09 post-edit)

Yes I am totally aware that I just jacked Billy Joel. I am sure he can pardon me since I am an innocent man and he is a piano man. And because Greyhound has been somewhat replaced by Craigslist. I know you get the jist.

Lets stop saying "I don't know" especially when we know and just don't want to say so.

SO SO SO SO what else but still if my mind is not still I become oh so ill and I stop giving out pills because it breaks our will to change the status quo and there is no status flow but there is the status blow and I am not talking Johnny Depp but we can still go oh so deep and creep till we weep that the chimney man has no chimney and Jiminy Cricket can't afford to be anywhere anymore because he has too many tickets and eats badly so now he has rickets.
But we just need to kick it and yes then perhaps we can lick it, but I am talking about leprosy. We are that change and we are the men and women in the mirror and neverland is not just a ranch but a branch of American soul history like Graceland. But don't worry Dolly we can still give your fair share of lolly pops. Yes they said June 25, 2009 was the day that pop music and one of Charlie's Angels died. And still I cry and we all just need to get a little bit crazy which is alot better then being a whole lot lazy...
Oh yeah yeah yeah yeah's give me a map so I can find if they don't really love me like you love me. I can't wait and I can't dance and I can't sing but I can raise myself to the occasion and sometimes I am known to be an emperor of persuasion. We are going to Graceland if Paul Simon and that other guy Marc Cohen won't stop mowing my lawn that has no grass. Because my ass was grass and that song was the lawnmower and now there is no ass to be found but I don't want to be crass but sometimes I swear I think my voice can break glass.
Try Michigan--it worked for Iggie Pop but still they say Pop is dead and we all need to find Right Said Fred. Thread the needle and we can end the H train out of Afghanistan. I am going to Iran if we don't quickly come up with a plan and my man Stan (a.k.a. my dad) needs to get a vegetable oil van.
Okay I admit maybe I take it too far and maybe there is no maybe just yes and no and too many people that say I don't know. Let us grow and know we can all go to Rothbury which is supposedly a spelling mistake and my achy breaky heart broke when Miley tried to mess with my Radiohead because they did not bow to her superstar demands.
I command to help humanity for a one man band and we can make this world amazingly grand but we don't need to make a stand. Instead we just shall be the nothingness until we all feeel estatic bliss.

Sunday, June 28, 2009

I Press To Express Divinity Through Dance

(Re-publication 11-15-09 post-edit)

Since I was a young child I have believed that nothing could affect a mass of people so quickly as my dance moves. Although, there is very little that I do from a technical standpoint that is not relatively easy to imitate.
Yet there is an intensity and devotion that takes place in my dancing that is an expression of everything that I have ever been and everything that I will ever be. This comes out when I am really dancing--when I am really going for broke.
There is something about going for broke that is perhaps one of the sexiest and most foolish things imaginable. It is to be a bridge between this world and the world that remains unseen by most, yet still it dictates everything that happens down here.
I reach such ecstatic states of joy and exhaustion when I dance. There is a deep real love being expressed as if I could just zip out of my body and expand into the cosmos. Every emotion that is welled up inside of me all starts to explode at once and it is a symphony. There are moments in the process where I become completely still and don't move it all.
People will remember me years later from seeing me dance one time at one place for one moment. It was not until I just typed it, that I realized how special that makes it. In many ways I just take that for granted. Some people would also take it for granted. Perhaps it is just merely because I am tall or merely because I am "spazz," but that doesn't really get at it. Nor does it explain the reaction as far as I can tell. I have seen people dance much better than myself, yet there remains something hidden and secretive in their dance and there is not a joy and bliss shared thru the experience.

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Just Trying To Make It Back Home

(Re-publication 11-17-09 post-edit)

"Where is home?" is the question that people either take for granted or for which they give an immediate response. It is usually one to which I find myself always giving a different reply. Recently I find myself wanting to say the Himalayas. In the past I used to say Burning Man, or the same place as everyone else, or wherever I happened to be in that moment.
I keep concentrating on the thought that we are all just beams of light making our way back to the sun/God/divinity/whatever you call or don't call it. I find myself trying to put pieces of the puzzle together, yet there is nothing to put together. Rather it is layers within myself to unravel. There are self defenses to let down, and expectations to drop so that I can experience things exactly as they are, instead of how my mind says they should be.
Sometimes I find myself wanting to be egotistical for the sake of being egotistical--ignoring the truth of who we all are. If other people pretend they are not special long enough, you might actually start to believe their story. And that's all it ever is: a "story" until we drop the story and there is just a beautiful infinite emptiness and oblivion of bliss. People seek to imitate this through sex, drugs, and other sense gratifications and yet it only poorly imitates these things sought.
I can't keep pretending or imitating or duplicating and trying to make sense of infinite with a finite perspective. I have known people in their different phases as they have known me in my different legs of the journey. One day soon someone will be sitting down to edit this, and it will reach millions of people around the world. This is something I have known and it is not because I am such a great writer, but because I offer people a small reminder of their true nature.
Whether Buddha/Christ/Mohammad/Moses/Khrishna/Ala or NO thing at all may all the egos fall and none of us will be small or tall. We are all part of the same cosmic ball.

We are reaching towards a new day and before we get to that point it can sting and be quite painful. However, that can lead to a GROWTH of a new awareness that is more vibrant yet constant so that it becomes the norm, instead of merely a passing feeling.

Friday, June 19, 2009

Brand New Chapter

(Re-publication 11-20-09 post-edit)

Sometimes you just know a new chapter is about to begin in your life and right before it happens things seem to get extra quiet. Appreciate that silence because you will look back on it longingly later on. We look back on things from the past with deep longing.
This moment is a perfect snapshot for all that is and will ever be, and yet knowing that, we can still strive to find more of what is inside of ourselves.
As each one of us awakens to our life's path it makes it easier for others to do the same. They are presented with more mirrors to show them the way towards their own bliss.
I am back in Ann Arbor, Michigan and recently payed respects to the wife of my former tai-chi-gong master. Still I have no more answers about how he awakened my gift within me.
My spiritual journey grows stronger and on occasion my mind distracts me from the greater task at hand. Yet it continues to lose its power to do so. My focus and concentration grows stronger and my heart opens more, and as the day unfolds more is revealed to me.
I Am finishing an 8-year cycle which represents 'infinite' and an new cycle is beginning. Remember "crazy" people have a way of seeing and speaking about the same things we see and perceive, but we refuse to acknowledge these things because it makes us uncomfortable.
The Himalayas get closer and closer to penetrating the core of American Spirituality. Jesus or Issa's missing time has always held a particular fascination for me. Anyone of us awakening helps all of us to awaken to our true Christ/Buddha nature. We are beings of "Light." Let that permeate thru your entire being.
Sometimes we can see the potential for something down the road, yet we have to deal with the ravine that we have to cross right now. We can have awareness of what awaits us later but we have to bring our immediate attention to the now and it will make things down the road much more special. Nothing is quite as it seems, but this is no reason to be paranoid about such a thing. Your unconditional love is your shield against all that the world can hoist at you.

Be your own best friend and the world will do the same with you. Have patience and perseverance and all shall be rewarded. The journey is long and arduous but the results are more then we can imagine. Keep taking your steps and keep transforming as we create a new day and a new chapter.

Saturday, June 06, 2009

Just Go with What feels right for you

I wonder what exactly makes for a proper education in a world where we are taught to seek outside of ourselves for our validation. Nothing is ever big enough and everything is super sized until you become sick yet we are over eating and are still under nourished. I found myself in Woodstock New York on my way to Burlington Vermont. I recently spent time with a Saint named Amma and not the one who is known for hugging. We all have to find our peace with ourselves and we all have our own way of going about finding this. It is easy not to judge when somebody doesn't judge you, but the greater challenge lies in not judging when somebody judges you. I am not different then anyone in that I seek a greater peace and joy within my own being that is not dependent on circumstances of any kind. I have been greatly benefited and gifted by many people along the way and continue to strive to experience and know the interconnectedness that we all share. I seek to express my emotions, thoughts and sentiments and to realize that I have not fully liberated myself until I no longer look outside of myself for validation that will never be enough for an ego that doesn't want to acknowledge its fleetingness. I always felt there was something more then what I was told. To be a spiritual seeker is to be deemed a Slacker, Lunatic, outcast and prophet and yet you are known and all of these things. I seek the council of those who have found a greater peace and acceptance then myself so that I can be guided back to my natural essence which is true for all of us. I wake up in a different place on a regular basis and each day offers new possibilities if I am open to a new experience that guides me closer to the source that we all come from. We all return from whence we came from and so much of the other stuff is merely a distraction from our true nature which we are told is foolhardy to seek. May we all be so lucky to be so foolhardy.
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